Byline: Binny Goldman

World is at your fingertips

At the latest Empowerment session, co-hosted by Jewish Seniors Alliance and JCC Seniors on Jan. 27, Philip Morris offers advice on avoiding fraud, scams and identity theft. (photo by Binny Goldman)

It was interesting to me – a person who still enjoys using one of the “original computers,” namely, the pencil – that I was about to attend a workshop entitled Technology: Give us the Tools to Finish the Job.

On Jan. 27, about 100 people gathered in the Jewish Community Centre of Greater Vancouver’s Wosk Auditorium to hear three experts in the field of technology at a workshop hosted by Jewish Seniors Alliance in partnership with the JCC seniors department. It was the second session of the current season’s JSA Snider Empowerment series.

JCC seniors program coordinator Leah Deslauriers welcomed the audience and outlined the afternoon’s activities, while Gyda Chud welcomed everyone on behalf of JSA. Chud explained how she was introduced to JSA via the Peretz Centre for Secular Jewish Culture four years ago and that JSA is always looking for new partners in its aim to make its workshops easily available and accessible to all who may be interested. Chud added that she hoped the Technology session would help build her own confidence when it came to computers and other aspects of the tech world.

Noting that living is learning, the first speaker, Stan Goldman, demonstrated the simplicity of mobile technology. Once one learns how to use the iPad, the knowledge can be applied to the iPhone, which uses the same system, and one may watch free movies, read free ebooks and newspapers, and get email by accessing the right app. To illustrate, Goldman and Deslauriers used voice commands to ask for directions, dictate an email and do advanced math. Goldman offered a seemingly endless list of things that can be done with this technology, including Skyping with family and friends in other countries, enjoying music, playing games, etc. – all by using apps, many of which are free. The world is, indeed, at your fingertips.

Philip Morris, an expert on fraud, scams and identity theft, spoke next. He said that, once we have let the world in, so to speak, we must be cautious when using our devices – protecting them with passwords, and keeping private our personal information (social insurance numbers, birth certificates, passports, etc.) and not easily accessible to hackers. Morris advised shredding all discarded documents and, when buying a new cellphone, making sure all of the personal information has been deleted from the old phone, as hackers can retrieve data from seemingly wiped phones. It is important to be alert in public places, to keep wallets and purses out of easy reach and to ensure that you have received your own credit card from the server in a restaurant. He also suggested taking a photograph of passports and credit cards in case of theft.

New words have been coined, such as “smishing,” the ability to obtain information from people’s texts. Morris recommended changing passwords annually and, when writing cheques in payment for credit cards, to reference only the last four numbers of the card. To report a theft or loss, Morris gave two numbers to call to check your credit profile: 1-800-465-7166 (Equifax) or 1-800-663-9980 (TransUnion Canada). For instances of fraud, he said to call the Canadian Anti-fraud Centre, 1-888-495-8501.

Mark White, “the gizmo guru,” gave advice on the latest fun gadgets, including some lesser-known ones, and where to get them. As far as finding directions, however, he warned people to keep paper maps on hand in case the technology fails to connect. White added that he reads the Vancouver Sun’s online version, and that the library offers many newspapers online to members. In order to keep Skype conversations private, he suggested using earphones if Skyping in a public place.

Isaac Waldman Jewish Public Library librarian Rossana Caritey explained that the Waldman has an extensive collection of ebooks, which can be read on any device – ebook readers, laptops, for example. If someone brings in their device, a librarian or volunteer can show them how to download books. Waldman librarian Helen Pinsky handed out further information to attendees.

Chud thanked the speakers, noting that each of them had exhibited in their talks the mission and ideals of JSA – that of advocating for, inspiring, educating others to be the best they can be.

The audience retired to enjoy light refreshments. Long lines formed at the workstations set up in the auditorium, clearly showing the keen interest in the session. The workshop may have eased many fears, allowing timid souls to venture through the now-open doors leading to new technological possibilities.

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.

 

Stories that empower

Shanie Levin brought Sholem Aleichem’s stories to life with Al Stein. (photo by Binny Goldman)

Tell me a story, please…. Which one of us has not made this request of a mother, a father, a zayda or bubbie?

On Oct. 30, almost 70 people gathered at the Peretz Centre for Secular Jewish Culture, where they were welcomed by Peretz president Gene Homel, who shared some of the activities that the centre hosts, including the Sholem Aleichem speaker series (SASS, or “SASSY,” as they call it). The Tuesday night event was held by Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver in partnership with SASSY.

Gyda Chud of both JSA and Peretz introduced the first session of this year’s JSA Elders Empowering Elders series, which focused on storytelling.

photo - Myrna Rabinowitz
The audience sat enraptured as they listened to Myrna Rabinowitz. (photo by Binny Goldman)

The audience sat enraptured, traveling back to their kinder yorn, childhood years, as they listened to Myrna Rabinowitz. She sang several Yiddish songs. Among her original compositions was one that she had composed for the birth of her grandson.

From stories told in song, to those spoken, Shanie Levin and Al Stein read stories that came alive with their interpretations of the text and their excellent delivery. Enhanced by the clever use of minimal but appropriate costuming, and done with humor, the characters and the way of life of Shayneh Shayndel and Menachem Mendel became real to those listening, as did the ongoing dilemma that they each faced. As Sholem Aleichem once famously stated, “You can take the Jew out of the shtetl but you cannot take the shtetl out of the Jew.”

In thanking the performers, Chud quoted Stein, who had said in his preface to reading his first story: “In keeping with the Narodnik movement (Power to the People), the young Russian intelligentsia at the time and not the elite, Sholem Rabinovitch chose the name Sholem Aleichem, the common Jewish greeting, as his pen name, ‘Peace be unto you.’” Chud commented on the fact that Power to the People motivated Sholem Rabinovitch to change his name, and that the theme of JSA’s Empowerment series is “Elders Empowering Elders.”

photo - Al Stein, with Shanie Levin, entertained with their lively storytelling
Al Stein, with Shanie Levin, entertained with their lively storytelling. (photo by Binny Goldman)

Ken Levitt, one of JSA’s vice-presidents, rose to the occasion by thanking the performers partly in Yiddish, having researched the phrasing on the internet. He explained that he hadn’t grown up in a Yiddish-speaking household, although Yiddish had been used as a secret language between his parents. His valiant effort endeared Levitt to all the Yiddish-speakers in the audience.

The session ended with eppes zees mit a Yiddish taam, something sweet with a Jewish taste, accompanied by hot drinks. To quote one of the characters in the story that Levin read: “If you have a piece of bread, take your eyes off the cake!”

Volunteers of both JSA and SASSY helped make the event a success, as did JSA staff Karon Shear and Rita Propp.

Es eez given a mechayeh, it was a pleasure and an oisgetzaichent, outstanding and enriching time together.

For more on JSA and future events, visit jsalliance.org.

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.

Showtimers wow audience

JCC Showtime’s cowgirl dance was an audience favorite. (photo by Binny Goldman)

The duet sung by Maurice Moses and Debbie Cossever, “Teach the World to Sing,” set the tone for the entire afternoon performance by JCC Showtime at the last of this year’s JSA Snider Foundation Empowerment Series, which had as its theme, “A Smile on Your Face, a Song in Your Heart.”

Toby Rubin, executive director of Kehila Society of Richmond, welcomed the crowd of 100 who gathered June 29 at Congregation Beth Tikvah for the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver and Kehila event.

Rabbi Howard Siegel, who led the Hamotzi, joked with those assembled that the reason there was no clock on the wall was because it would not suffice to record the length of his sermon (which he said he was about to deliver), as his would require a calendar.

After the BBQ lunch catered by Stacey Kettleman – and just before a huge cake honoring all the volunteers was served – Rubin called up a number of those volunteers from her various committees and presented them with certificates.

Rubin said that, in the audience, there were people from the Louis Brier Home and Hospital, L’Chaim Adult Day Centre, JSA, Angels There for You, CARP and seniors from Beth Tikvah, as well as people who had heard about the event through publicity.

The program began with “Happy Opening“ and showcased the talents of the JCC Showtime performers, accompanied on piano by Muriel Morris and with Gary Zumar as sound technician.

photo - Arnold Selwyn leads other JCC Showtimers in a song
Arnold Selwyn leads other JCC Showtimers in a song. (photo by Binny Goldman)

Each number presented new and charming scenarios, which included quick and clever costume changes. Some crowd favorites were the duets “Together” and “Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off” by Arnold and Nassa Selwyn; the guest appearance of “Dolly,” Marshall Berger dressed as a woman; Cossever belting out “Can’t Get a Man with a Gun”; Moses engaging the crowd with “Beautiful Morning”; and the striking cowgirl dance, as well as “Chattanooga Choo Choo.” Two of the last songs, “Tzena Tzena” and “Hava Nagila,” led by Moses and Arnold Selwyn, took the crowd to Israel as they sang along.

Complex choreography and the blink-of-an-eye costume changes were all conceived and created by the founder of JCC Showtime, Beryl Israel, who immigrated in 2002 from South Africa, where she had been involved with a similar program.

photo - Videographer Stan Shear, left, and performer Maurice Moses
Videographer Stan Shear, left, and performer Maurice Moses. (photo by Binny Goldman)

Rounding out the Showtime lineup were Sara Bernstein, Rona Black, Lisa Conn, Andria Engel, Tamar Glaser and Susan Goldstein.

Just as the performers were about to leave the stage, Berger was handed the microphone and asked to sing “Happy Birthday” to his wife, Marilyn Berger, president of JSA, who was celebrating her birthday that afternoon. He was joined by all the performers in the singing of a touching rendition of the song.

Marilyn Berger thanked the performers for a wonderfully joyful afternoon that traveled down memory lane and she also gave a short talk about JSA, highlighting its advocacy and its peer support program. She then handed out gifts for each of the cast, helped by Kenneth Levitt, one of JSA’s vice-presidents.

Stan Shear, with Karon Shear, JSA coordinator, by his side, made a video of the performance, which will be posted at jsalliance.org.

It was an afternoon that definitely put smiles on faces and songs in hearts.

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.

 

Giving is a way to live well

Graduates of the Jewish Seniors Alliance peer support program, and teachers. (photo by Binny Goldman)

On June 11, I walked into a room filled with givers – of themselves. It was the special occasion of the graduation ceremony of the fifth class of peer counselors, which took place at the Peretz Centre for Secular Jewish Culture.

They were 13 men and women of various ages who had met as strangers and quickly become an extended family of friends. Through 11 weekly five-hour sessions in which interactive role-playing was used, they were taught how to listen, comprehend and use their newly acquired techniques.

Charles Leibovitch, coordinator of peer support services, warmly welcomed those gathered – family and friends of those receiving certificates and members of the board of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver. He introduced himself and Grace Hann, trainer and supervisor of the peer counseling program, then credited the founder of JSA, president emeritus Serge Haber, for being instrumental in initiating the program and working diligently to ensure that it thrived through continuous and crucial funding issues to meet the ongoing needs of our growing senior community.

Leah Deslauriers, coordinator of seniors at the Jewish Community Centre of Greater Vancouver, informed the audience of the many and varied activities open to all people (Jewish or not) at the centre for a nominal fee. She encouraged all to visit and partake in yoga, swimming, card playing and just general socializing. Expressing the wish for further partnering with the JSA, she extended a mazel tov to the graduates.

Barb Kirby of Community Resource Network said that, in both a personal and professional capacity, she had seen many gaps in the care of seniors over the years. “One of the greatest gaps we see is lack of support causing social isolation of seniors and that is why your job is so important. Your training and expertise provides a lifeline to those who truly are in greatest need,” she said.

“They say it takes a village to raise a child. I believe it take a village to care for the elderly and it takes a special kind of person to care for the elderly. You are that caring voice or the person sitting next to someone who truly needs a caring human connection or to go one step further to help get the further supports they might need.” One individual, organization or government cannot do it alone, said Kirby. “Speaking up, sharing knowledge and best practices will help make our communities a safer, more enjoyable place for those who need our support.”

She thanked Haber and JSA president Marilyn Berger “for providing all the invaluable services to bring awareness through education and support to our communities.”

Becky Herrmann of Angels There For You noted that people want to be needed, sought after and validated. She recommended the book Give to Live, and said there were no side effects to giving of oneself, urging everyone to try doing so. Larry Shapiro, one of the graduates, countered with, “There are side effects, but no negative ones.” Herrmann later presented each of the graduates with a gift.

Shapiro spoke next, sharing with the audience that, having completed the course, he felt prepared to go out and serve as a counselor. He proceeded to give a little history of peer support counseling in British Columbia, which has been present since the 1980s, addressing social isolation and other daily issues affecting seniors. Shapiro felt the course had taught him empathy, as well as the skills and techniques necessary to offer others methods of self-help.

Fellow graduate Neveen Hossameldin said that, as an immigrant, what one missed most were the friendships left behind, and that she didn’t have another 55 years to forge new ones. Yet, after 55 hours as part of this group, she had indeed made new, lasting friendships. Hossameldin appreciated that Haber had told the class that they were not working for JSA but were part of JSA. Echoing what others had said, she praised Hann for making the sessions pleasurable and warm.

Hann, laughing, said that since Shapiro had stolen a good chunk of her speech, she would just thank JSA and its founder, Haber, who deserved a special tribute for his vision, without which the program would not exist. She underscored that self-absorption kills empathy, that focusing on ourselves makes our world contract whereas giving to others broadens our world.

Leibovitch spoke of the ongoing need for peer support services and of the graduates who go out in the community to help combat the loneliness he sees daily. He said that phone calls to the office are often by those who have been guided by others to use the peer services, and that this essential, relevant help has become very valuable in the community. Karon Shear, coordinator of JSA, and Rita Propp were thanked for their constant commitment to excellence and giving of themselves.

Haber said, “Don’t do unto others what you don’t want others to do unto you,” a teaching found in other religions as well. Giving of yourself – so necessary both to the giver and the receiver – helps to alleviate loneliness, isolation and perhaps even remove the tarnish from the gold quite often present but hidden in the “golden years.” JSA is very proud of this program, he said, adding that he, too, had taken the course to familiarize himself with what was being offered and that he, too, had learned to really listen and hear what was being said. He concluded with the wish that all the graduates would go out and spread good will.

Certificates were handed out along with a rose to each graduate, as was a hug from both Hann and Leibovitch.

Ruby Boychuk, one of the graduates, presented Hann with a bouquet of yellow roses, explaining that yellow roses symbolized love and appreciation.

Family and friends proudly took photos of the celebration, while Stan Shear took a video that will be posted on the JSA website. Refreshments shared by all helped bring the evening to a close, leaving a sweet taste in our mouths and in our hearts. Mazel tov, graduates. Mazel tov, JSA.

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.

Some superior senior solutions

Michael Geller, left, and Dr. Eric Cadesky. (photo by Binny Goldman)

Every year, we look to the Jewish Seniors Alliance Spring Forum for inspiration and the 170 people gathered in the Wosk Auditorium at the Jewish Community Centre of Greater Vancouver on April 26 found it.

Debbie Cossever, representing the Jewish Seniors Alliance, and Claire Weiss of the L’Chaim Adult Day Centre were co-chairs of the partnered event, entitled YOLO: You Only Live Once – How Full is Your Cup?

Marshall Berger opened the afternoon’s program with a humorous song to the tune of “Side by Side” about a newly married aged couple. Cossever welcomed the audience, described the aims of JSA and invited newcomers to join the organization. JSA has approximately 700 members, including 34 affiliates representing more than 5,000 seniors in the Greater Vancouver area.

Cossever introduced Weiss, who explained that the afternoon was also a celebration of L’Chaim’s 30th anniversary, the group having started in the Beth Israel Youth Lounge in 1985 and then moving to the J in 1988. Last year, their staff delivered 1,933 client hours. She reminded those present that they are always looking for more members to join their “family.” The candles on a huge chocolate cake celebrating the 30 years were lit and all sang “Happy Anniversary,” which ended with calls of mazel tov!

Moderator Gloria Levi, a social services consultant, was then introduced. Levi has a master’s degree in public policy and is the author of Dealing with Memory Changes As You Grow Older and a series of booklets, Challenges of Later Life.

She introduced Michael Geller, an architect, planner, real estate consultant and property developer, who serves on the adjunct faculty of Simon Fraser University’s Centre for Sustainable Community Development. The talk was conducted in an interview format.

Geller’s topic was Lessons My Father Taught Me. He acquainted listeners with the unique and collaborative relationship he shared with his father, Sam Geller, who was one of the first members of the Jewish Senior Advisory Council (the original name of the JSA). He passed away 11 years ago at the age of 92.

Sam Geller was born in England and was a soldier in the Second World War who had survived being a prisoner of war. That occurrence colored his life. The very fact that he had survived made him happy and grateful to be alive and he never sought material things for happiness, often saying that things could have been so much worse. He moved to Vancouver from Toronto and enjoyed life at Langara Gardens, his grandchildren visiting him, doing Sudoku, crosswords, swimming and exercising daily. Then, after an emergency life-saving surgery, Geller said his father attempted to live each day to the fullest, saying, after all, it could very be his last.

Geller said his dad was a stoic, truly enjoying what he had rather than accumulating more items just to impress others who he may not care about in the first place. The lesson he received from his father was “Do what you enjoy, what makes you happy and continue contributing to the happiness of others, as that increases one’s own inner joy.” Geller recommended the book The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy by William B. Irvine.

The love and respect that Geller said he felt for his father was reflected on his face throughout the talk. Thoughts of his father swimming are with him as he does his own laps in the pool.

Levi then introduced Dr. Eric Cadesky, a family physician, assistant professor at the University of British Columbia, medical coordinator at Louis Brier Home and Hospital and a board member of Doctors of British Columbia. His presentation was entitled Getting It Just Right: How to Maximize Your Quality of Senior Life.

Cadesky disclosed that his mother-in-law was amused when she learned of his topic and asked, “What do you know about aging?” He explained that all of us age, no matter our number of years, but it is how we do it that is really important.

Cadesky believes that some of the choices we make act to decrease our quality and length of life and suggested that people live by three guidelines: Do enough. Not too much. Start now.

Enough means to be active, to walk or swim, as movement will lessen and ease pain. Enough also means to eat fresh, colorful foods that don’t require a microwave or have an expiry date. Enough means to socialize, learn a new language, do puzzles, these activities help to keep dementia at bay. Enough also means to use patience to deal with people who give you advice and knowing what advice to toss aside.

Not too much reminds us that anything that sounds too good to be true usually is. Certain vitamins (except for Vitamin D and B12) can be unhealthy to take in pill form. For example, post-menopausal women should not be taking calcium, and A, C, E, copper, zinc and selenium should be acquired from fresh food only. It is very important to be honest with your doctor when seeking medical advice. Sometimes “de-prescribing” is necessary – and an assessment can be made on all of your medications.

Start now means that we should be discussing with our doctors challenges that may be stopping us from doing what we want to be doing. Also, we generally do more for others than we choose to do for ourselves and we should start thinking of ourselves.

Cadesky advised us to have a realistic approach to life and not to fall for advertisements, which may be totally misleading. Scrutinize, be critical and intelligent in your choices and have confidence in your doctors, he said. Remember, too, he said, making others happy enriches our own happiness.

Audience questions were many. How can we ease a senior’s loneliness? Get involved in activities, he said, perhaps at JSA or L’Chaim. What are the benefits of fish oil? There is benefit in eating fresh fish but not in taking fish oil in pill form, he answered. There was also a discussion around the value of probiotics and alternative medicine. Cadesky recommended directing individual questions to your physician and stressed how critical it is to be honest with your doctor. A question, which made everyone laugh, was “Are you taking any new patients?”

Marilyn Berger, JSA president, and Serge Haber, JSA president emeritus, thanked the many volunteers who made the event possible. Special thanks went to the co-chairs, table sponsors and staff, Annica Carlsson, Karon Shear, Rita Propp, and to Stan Shear for videotaping the session, which will be posted to the JSA website (jsalliance.org).

Door prizes were then handed out to the delight of the recipients. Over tea and coffee and chocolate cake, as well as fresh fruit and veggies by Susy Segal’s Nava Catering, helped by Bagel Club volunteers Ophira Schwartzfeld, Harriet Corda and David Benbaruj, attendees felt we had experienced an extraordinary afternoon and had adhered to the advice of our two speakers and that adage of Dr. Charles Glassman, “Live your everyday extraordinary!”

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.

We walk a little taller

Karon Shear, left, and Marilyn Berger. (photo by Binny Goldman)

Moshe Feldenkrais is quoted as saying, “When you know what you are doing, then you can do what you want!” How appropriate that some of us who spent the two nights of the Passover seders sitting at the table – or reclining, as directed – were now being taught to sit properly.

On April 13, about 50 people gathered at the Oakridge Seniors Centre (OSC) to attend an event co-hosted by Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver to learn the helpful movements of the Feldenkrais Method.

Alexandra Henriques, manager of OSC, graciously welcomed the audience and called upon JSA president Marilyn Berger, who said how impressed she was with the surroundings and the newsletter put out by OSC, and said she would come back to sample some of the lunches being offered at the centre. Berger then acquainted those gathered with the aims of JSA, mentioning its advocacy for the betterment of the quality of life for seniors and the peer-counseling courses being offered.

photo - Feldenkrais instructor Vita Kolodny
Feldenkrais instructor Vita Kolodny. (photo by Binny Goldman)

Berger then introduced Vita Kolodny, a nurse and a movement educator, who gently eased the audience through the mindful movements that can be used to ease back pain. By a quick questioning of the audience, we learned that almost all in attendance had suffered from back pain at one time or another.

We all sit so much during the day, doubling the stress placed on our back compared to when we stand, Kolodny explained. That is why we may prefer to stand when experiencing back pain.

Kolodny led those gathered through the correct way of positioning our bodies and ways of strengthening the skeletal muscles. It is important to reeducate our brains to the new ways of sitting by repeating the movements we learned, slowly and with awareness of how our whole body participates, with a rest in between the exercise.

A question was asked by Lou Segal: “Is it better to train one’s body to sit in the new and correct way, even while resting, so it becomes our natural way of sitting?” The answer was yes.

Dr. Norman Doidge’s book The Brain’s Way of Healing was recommended reading if attendees cared to learn more about neuroplasticity and the Feldenkrais Method.

Some constructive and supportive suggestions were made during the demonstration. For example, sit forward in a chair with feet flat on the floor. A pillow may be placed behind your back, remembering to maintain the arch in your back. As well, it helps to sit on an armless chair, stool or exercise ball while maintaining good balance.

Gyda Chud of JSA thanked Kolodny, using her penchant for alliteration, saying “Vita was vital, vivacious and vibrant in her presentation,” echoing the feelings of the audience, all of whom were visibly sitting upright, already making the changes suggested by Kolodny that afternoon.

Not only were our hearts smiling – as suggested in the theme – but our spines were, as well.

Discussions followed over dessert and hot drinks.

Berger, in thanking “the gregarious Gyda Chud and our ever incredible Karon Shear,” reminded everyone of the JSA Spring Forum on April 26, which will take place at the Jewish Community Centre of Greater Vancouver. The theme is YOLO: You Only Live Once.

So, let’s live it tall!

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.

Enjoy an afternoon movie

Would you like to go to the movies? Yes? That is exactly what about 80 people did on Nov. 25 at the Peretz Centre for Secular Jewish Culture, thanks to the wonderful combined effort of Jewish Seniors Alliance and Vancouver Jewish Film Centre, which co-host a movie screening scheduled on the afternoon of the last Tuesday of every month.

Upon arriving, we were treated to a light buffet of bagels, sweets, fruit and beverages, then we headed to the large auditorium, where VJFC director Robert Albanese welcomed the audience and introduced the day’s film, The Outrageous Sophie Tucker.

After Gyda Chud, on behalf of JSA, made some announcements, including that the previously scheduled JSA Empowerment series talk Oy Vey, My Back! will be presented in March, Albanese spoke of the variety of films that the film centre will be presenting over the next few months. Then, Sophie Tucker “entered” our world.

Tucker was born Sonya Kalish to Ukrainian Jewish parents in 1886 as they fled from czarist Russia. She only became Sophie Tucker after she adopted her former husband’s name, Tuck, and added the “er.” That name became a password that could be used to gain entry to celebrities and even presidents.

In the film, authors and biographers Lloyd and Susan Ecker relate much of Tucker’s story.

When very young, she worked in her parents’ kosher restaurant, a job she did not enjoy. One day, her father asked her to distribute pamphlets at theatres as the actors left, since most of them were Jewish. He thought it would increase the number of diners.

While doing this task, Tucker heard the music from inside a theatre, she snuck in and what she saw changed her life forever, as well as the lives of her future audiences. She ran away to New York, leaving her family, but knowing where she belonged.

She tried vaudeville but, not being a classic beauty, she had difficulty being accepted “as is,” so she sang in “black face.” Eventually, her powerful voice began to be heard. When she forgot her makeup one day and sang as herself, the show was a success – she never performed in black face again.

Irving Berlin wrote music for her and she “stopped the show” when she sang. Tucker worked without a contract; her word or a handshake was sufficient.

Tucker was respected and she respected others, asking for their names, numbers and addresses upon meeting them and entering those contacts in a book, which eventually housed 10,000 names. She would write to these people if she were coming to their towns, asking them to come see her perform. She was the original Facebook – only it was the Tuckerbook.

Ted Shapiro, her accompanist for 46 years, had the unique talent of being able to interpret the mood that Tucker wished to portray.

In later years, mobsters took over the ownership of many nightclubs and Tucker befriended Al Capone. He enjoyed having her sing, as she brought people into his Chez Paris. He called her a “human cash register.”

In the years to come, Tucker decided to share what she knew and opened a school teaching young women how to be “Red Hot Mamas.”

She knew how to market herself: in the 1930s, she was the spokeswoman for soup; in the 1940s, she advertised blouses for the fuller mamas, saying she enjoyed being overweight – “Too much of a good thing is wonderful!” She prided herself on having creative and huge hairdos, calling herself the “Modern Marie Antoinette,” and always carried a large filmy handkerchief as she performed.

In 1929, the biggest entertainer was Al Jolson and he sang in the first talkie. That same year, Warner Bros. had Tucker debut in the movie Honky Tonk, where she sang “Some of These Days,” a song with which she is still identified. Judy Garland learned how to “sell a song” from Tucker.

During the war, Tucker was one of the performers to whom soldiers wrote and received answers. She was a pinup girl along with Betty Grable.

There was a young Jewish soldier who was obsessed with music and hauled around his records, vowing that he would play Tucker’s rendition of “My Yiddishe Mameh” in Berlin when he beat Hitler. Unfortunately, he died before he could accomplish this goal but his fellow soldiers fulfilled his vow, much to the anger of some German soldiers, as that song had been banned in Germany. The victors played it for eight hours through the streets of Berlin.

Tucker remained on top for 58 years, into the television era. Along the way, she befriended many, including Josephine Baker, who, because she was black, was having a hard time being allowed to perform – until Tucker invited her to sing with her.

Tucker’s talent and her voice were both immeasurable, but her true outstanding ability was in marketing herself when there wasn’t the media infrastructure there is now. She was indeed the last of the Red Hot Mamas, a glowing ember, memorable, still admired, still inspiring!

Expressing what we all felt, Chud thanked Albanese for enriching our lives with this movie, then we all went home with the echo of a song in our hearts, “Some of These Days.”

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.

JSA forum on mental health

At the recent Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver fall symposium, left to right: Peggy Casey, Lorilee Mallek, Nora Paul, Mark Godfrey and Grace Hann. (photo by Binny Goldman)

A capacity crowd of 175 gathered at the Peretz Centre for Secular Jewish Culture on Sunday, Oct. 26, to learn more about mental health and wellness, the topic of this year’s Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver fall symposium.

JSA president Marilyn Berger opened the session by asking the audience to rise in the name of mental health and to honor the soldiers who had lost their lives that week in Canada. This was followed by O Canada, led by Barbara Bronstein and Debbie Cossover, with Claire Cohen joining them in the singing of Hatikvah, and Marshall Berger accompanying on piano.

Gyda Chud introduced herself and co-convener Bev Cooper, and proceeded to inform those in attendance of the various projects that are JSA’s main concerns: advocacy, Senior Line Magazine, peer support counseling and the Empowerment Series. She went on to explain that the day’s topic had been chosen by attendees at past events, via the evaluation cards they had filled out citing this issue as a particular interest.

Cooper introduced the first speaker and the panel moderator, Dr. Penny MacCourt, past president of the B.C. Psychogeriatric Association, who admitted that she, too, will become a senior this summer.

MacCourt said that mental health is often equated with mental illness but that they are not the same thing. She emphasized the need to teach people ways in which to cope in the face of adversity; to help moderate the impact of stress, and facilitate social and emotional well-being. We as a society need to provide supportive living shelters, and continuous inclusiveness and access to such services, she said.

Help should be provided to those in need to maintain self-esteem and achieve effective coping strategies, she added, as these are the “protective factors” that can ease or ward off risks, including social isolation, limited income, loneliness, challenging life transitions, and lack of meaningful activity.

Dr. Martha Donnelly spoke next. At one time the director of the division of geriatric psychiatry at the University of British Columbia and a leader in the development of guidelines for geriatric mental health practice, she outlined some “red flag” symptoms of depression: appetite disturbance, loss of weight, early morning wakefulness, lower energy, and wishing life were over. The highest rate of suicide is in the senior years, she said.

One of Donnelly’s patients, Don Carroll, a very young 82, offered the audience a glimpse into his former work life, which included being an instrumental part of TV shows such as Mr. Dress Up and The Friendly Giant, and his subsequent descent into a depression from which he could not emerge on his own. With Donnelly’s continuing help, Carroll has returned to being an outgoing, fun, contributing person; a difficult journey for him, his supportive wife, Nancy, and family. It took resolute determination on all their parts to get Carroll to where he is now – off any medication and sharing with others his belief that one can heal with the correct diagnosis, therapy, doctor and support, to regain the ability to rely on oneself. The process was slow, including group therapy, daily exercise, medication and “thought catching,” tossing out negative thoughts before they take hold.

Grace Hann, who is currently working with JSA as a trainer and supervisor of peer support services, acknowledged JSA president emeritus Serge Haber for his vision to initiate the peer services as a vital project of JSA.

Hann is president of Senior Peer Counseling of British Columbia and on the YWCA board of the Community Action on Elder Abuse Project. She explained that it takes a peer to fully comprehend the feelings one is experiencing, such as loss of a loved one, age-related challenges, relocation, family discord – all situations that need empathy, which she described as “echoes of another person in ourselves.”

Hann called upon three graduates of JSA’s program to do role-playing, one of the methods used in the 55-hour course in peer counseling. They performed skits depicting examples of exchanges between clients and counselors at Week 1 and in Week 54. It showed the process through which the trainees had gone and from which they had grown from the initial expectations of their own abilities and finally gaining the knowledge and understanding of how to deal with the challenges clients face, such as loss of vision, a loved one and/or freedom and independence.

Trainees are taught to not use JAR: judgment, advice or rescue. Rather, counselors employ the three Es: empowerment, empathy and emotion. Both clients and counselors have benefited from the interactive sessions, said Hann, noting that there is a waiting list.

Hann then introduced a special guest, Tanja, 91, who, when Denmark was invaded by the Germans, secretly and at high risk to herself, helped Jewish adults and children escape to Sweden. Tanja shared that one of her most gratifying moments was witnessing the uniting of a mother with her child in a kindergarten when the war was over. She also shared that, many years later, here in Canada, when she was ill with cancer and reached out for help, she received empathy and understanding. Tanja was given a standing ovation by those attending, many of whom had been moved to tears listening to her.

The symposium came to a close with Berger thanking the speakers, presenting them with gift certificates. She made special mention of the co-conveners as well as JSA coordinator Karon Shear and the entire symposium committee for putting together such a successful event.

Refreshments and discussions followed. The audience left with much to contemplate but assured in the knowledge of where and to whom to turn should the need arise.

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.

 

 

 

Maggidah Shoshana Litman entertains at L’Chaim

L’Chaim Adult Day Centre member Shirley Kort, right, and her friend Zoe Oreck, who came to visit, listen to Kort’s daughter, Shoshana Litman, tell a story. (photo from L’Chaim)

I was invited into a very special world on June 30 – that of L’Chaim Adult Day Centre. Described as a therapeutic day centre for home-bound elderly, a place where safe, caring monitoring is provided along with kosher, home-style meals in a happy, embracing atmosphere, with multilingual staff, it is all that and more.

I was asked by Shoshana Litman, a gifted maggidah (storyteller), to come and watch one of her sessions at L’Chaim. After receiving permission to attend from Annica Carlsson, who is in charge of the centre, I arrived in time to see 14 seniors, mostly women, actively enjoying a ball exercise led by Marla Simcoff. When that ended, Litman entered the circle, smiled, introduced herself and explained why she was there, and that I was there to take photographs.

Litman opened with a blessing over the water, which she drank, and then introduced her mother, Shirley Kort, a member of L’Chaim and her mom’s friend, Zoe Oreck, who had come to visit.

The story Litman had chosen was one of Peninah Schramm’s – The Innkeeper’s Wise Daughter – which included riddles and a song. It easily invited audience participation and the listeners were only too glad to do so.

After I listened, enjoyed and participated in Litman’s storytelling, and I heard the various questions and answers, I began to realize the scope of what is accomplished under the watchful eyes of L’Chaim staff and Carlsson, who explained that the wide range of work on cognitive skills is easily managed because of the small size of the group.

In honor of her visit and in her mother’s name, Litman presented a copy of a calendar commemorating the 151 years of Congregation Emanu-El in Victoria. She showed photos of the costumes worn on the anniversary evening last year, as the event included a reenactment of those times. The photos brought back precious memories for one audience member, who was reminded that she had attended that event.

I left with a good feeling, and the others, who were chatting away over lunch with one another, also seemed relaxed and happy. We are fortunate to have this facility in our midst. Let’s grow old together.

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.

Retirement is something for which we must prepare, or “rewire”

It was a capacity crowd at Jewish Senior Alliance’s Spring Forum on May 4. (photo by Binny Goldman)

Gyda Chud, co-convener and current board member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver, as well as an original member of the Peretz Centre for Secular Jewish Culture, enthusiastically welcomed a capacity crowd of 180 to this year’s annual JSA Spring Forum, which took place on May 4 at the Peretz. The theme was “Retired/Rewired.”

Chud acquainted those attending with the philosophy, programs and purpose of JSA and reminded us that life learning leads to the best quality of life. She advocated that we should all be volunteers, saying, “Volunteers are not paid – not because they are worthless but rather because they are priceless.”

Bev Cooper read her poem about how she came up with the word “rewired,” rather than retired. For Cooper, the word “rewirement” has become her cue to search for ways to ride the waves in the difficult times. And, in the more comfortable times, rewirement propels her to use the opportunity to seek out new challenges.

Cooper then called upon Gloria Levi, social worker, consultant in the field of gerontology and co-author of Dealing with Memory Changes as You Grow Older, to be the moderator of the afternoon’s forum. She spoke of her personal connection to JSA and introduced gerontologist Roz Kaplan, director of the seniors program at Simon Fraser University’s continuing studies.

Kaplan said that most people nowadays will live some 30 years after retirement and that we need to prepare for that time. Retirement is not a destiny but a journey for which we should “pack” essentials and, as with all journeys, some of us will be better equipped and prepared than others for the trip.

With the average life span for Canadians now into the 80s, we were encouraged to keep learning: an instrument, a language, dance steps, the means to rise to challenges and accept change.

We were told we needed confidants, connections, community and having a passion. This journey would be a path to opportunity and, as we age, we should divest ourselves of “extra luggage” to enable us to reinvent ourselves. Most of us got through life identifying ourselves with our work, noted Kaplan, and reinvention would allow us a chance to ease into retirement.

The stages of life usually encompass birth, education, work, retirement, death. It is up to us to fill in the gaps with personal growth. Many of us return to an encore career. Family, friends, fitness, travel, volunteering and various hobbies serve to keep us vital. A recommended read was Creating a Healthy Retirement by Dr. Ronald and Lois Richardson.

After a brief question period, Levi introduced speaker John F. Helliwell, an officer of the Order of Canada, a fellow of the Royal Society and senior fellow and co-director of the Canadian Institute for Advanced Research. As a professor emeritus at the University of British Columbia, Helliwell has written articles on “how to build happy lives,” the topic of his talk, and is a co-editor of The World Happiness Report.

We started by singing “If You’re Happy and You Know It.” Helliwell asked if we were any happier after the shared singing than before, and most, if not all, of us were.

How do we measure happiness? Usually this is not a question asked by our doctor or therapist; rather, we are asked if we are sad or depressed or possess negative feelings. Negativity is not only a state of mind but also affects our physical well-being, Helliwell explained.

An example was given of students in a hotel room who were all exposed to the rhinovirus. Those with negative feelings/attitude generally succumbed to the cold germ, whereas those with a positive outlook were much less affected, with some even escaping being sick entirely. It was also suggested that we need to concentrate more on health building rather than health repair.

Economic factors are far less important to happiness than bonds with other people and assisting each other to overcome strife and difficult circumstances. Iceland and Ireland were given as examples of quality of life because the people living there showed, on average, more concern and care for one another.

Aristotle stated that a fine quality of life brings happiness to individuals in a variety of forms but we all agreed on aspects needed for good quality of life: food, health, trust, freedom (to make decisions and feel actively engaged in one’s life) and generosity (doing nice things for others raises one’s own happiness).

Another example offered by Helliwell was of a care home in Denmark, where the staff had been asked to design the home as if they themselves were to be its residents. Their advice was to do away with uniforms for staff, to dispense with bibs and to make mealtimes variable. At one of the homes, the chef even drove the residents to a local movie theatre and they all enjoyed annual holidays together, more like one would expect if one were with close family.

In a residence where there were two floors, one known as generally happy, the other, unhappy, residents on the “unhappy floor” were asked to design the space in which they would be living in a new building and suggestions were made, followed and increased happiness ensued.

In another instance, a seniors residence was combined with a day care, and seniors and juniors interacted happily, all benefiting, a little like symbiosis. No one broke the rules, nobody wandered away searching for the home they had left – they all felt they were home.

During the question period, it was asked why Israelis are happy even though they live such stressful lives. The answer seemed to be that there really is no time for introspection. As well, all are united in the common bond to continue to defend and build their country and that aim/purpose builds happiness.

A last question was about how we can continue to be selfishly happy if many of the rest of the world seems so unhappy. The answer was, “Whose misery is lessened by our being unhappy?”

After summarizing the two speakers’ talks, Levi spoke of JSA president Serge Haber and his countless contributions to the community through the years and of his being one of those honored at the Louis Brier Jewish Aged Foundation’s Eight Over Eighty (on May 25).

Haber asked everyone to rise for a moment’s silence to mark Yom Hazikaron, commemorating fallen soldiers; he pointed out the Israeli flags in the centre of each flower arrangement, celebrating Israel’s Independence Day. As refreshments prepared by Bagel Club Catering were served by JSA volunteers, Haber thanked those who had convened the forum and emphasized that much of this would not have been possible without the efforts of the amazing staff, Karon Shear and Rita Propp. Shear also took a video of the forum, which will appear on the JSA website.

Herb Calderwood, the afternoon’s musical entertainer, handed out songbooks and charmed the crowd by announcing that he may not know all the songs in the book, as he does not read music, but he asked us to call out our request by number. He delighted us as well with a game of “Name That Tune,” and those who guessed the tune were rewarded with a prize. Door prizes further kept the happiness quotient high and the afternoon came to a happy conclusion, as the audience did indeed leave rewired.

Binny Goldman is a member of the Jewish Seniors Alliance of Greater Vancouver board.