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November 28, 2008
No bark and no bite
The New Yorkers is a plot-challenged novel.
SHELLEY CIVKIN
This is the second in a monthly series co-ordinated by the Isaac Waldman Jewish Public Library and the Jewish Independent, featuring local community leaders reviewing books that they have recently read.
Walkies, anyone? Looking for the "paws" that refreshes? Well, a lightweight little novel called The New Yorkers, by Cathleen Schine (Picador US, 2007), might just do the trick. Or not. With a front cover featuring a white pit bull staring out of pink-rimmed eyes, all I could think was gee, that dog looks unhappy. And I would be too, if I were a character stuck in the middle of a mediocre novel about isolated New York singles and their dogs.
Schine takes a peek at the microcosm that exists on a single street on the Upper West Side in this plot-challenged novel. She exposes the tedious, isolated lives of a pack of dog owners and their pets, and makes it clear that the dogs are the only ones with personality. The carefree canines unwittingly become catalysts for the relational dynamics that take place between the characters. It is only the dogs, with their ongoing need for exercise and fire hydrants, which enable their owners to connect with each other in this world peopled by lonely, depressed souls.
On the human front, the characters are eminently forgettable, and it's the dogs that just barely keep the book afloat. There's Beatrice, the white pit bull and cover-dog, who was rescued from the SPCA by Jody, a meek, late-thirty-something "spinster schoolteacher" who lives in a tiny bachelor apartment. While walking her dog, Jody meets Everett, the older man who lives across the street. Everett is depressed, divorced and dull, but he has a nice smile, and that's enough to captivate Jody. Everett's description of himself as "an emotional minimalist" says it all.
Then there's Howdy, the puppy whose last owner abandoned him in the apartment closet and then hung himself. New tenant Polly, who was recently dumped by her boyfriend, adopts Howdy and quickly embraces her new life in the canine lane. It just so happens that Polly lives in the same building as Everett. No sooner do these two meet than Everett takes a liking to both dog and owner. The plot thickens ... or does it? Not so much.
George is Polly's brother and a natural chick magnet, despite his scruffy appearance and lack of ambition. Soon after Polly moves into her apartment, she convinces George to move in with her. As you might guess, boy and dog bond instantly, and George is not above using Howdy to pick up girls.
To create some tension in the story, there's Doris, the white SUV-driving snob who openly dislikes dogs and tries to get them banned from the neighborhood during daylight hours. Pit bull Beatrice senses Doris' animosity and takes every opportunity to pee on the tires of Doris' previously spotless vehicle. Let's hear it for Beatrice!
Simon, a quiet neighborhood recluse, takes an interest in Jody, but loves foxhunting more. He's described as "beautifully dressed and graceful in his movements" but also someone who "seemed always to be in a kind of geographical distress ... like someone who was lost, someone trying to get his bearings." Jamie and Noah are gay partners and parents to several kids, and Jamie owns the bar/restaurant where all the characters hang out.
In a novel where human romantic interests are secondary to caring for their dogs, you can't help but wonder how anybody on this Upper West Side street ever hooks up. Their social lives consist of walking their dogs and hoping for a chance encounter with the object of their desire in front of a fire hydrant. Eventually, all the characters and their dogs become mildly connected in this bland novel.
The New Yorkers has a little bit of everything, but not a lot of anything. There's little plot or character development, and the dialogue is underwhelming. If you're a dog lover, have a great deal of patience and don't expect much, it might strike a chord with you. If you're looking for meat among the kibble, you're going to go home hungry. I found it to be a yawner. It moved unbearably slowly, and there was just no bark to it. Certainly no bite. What's up with these people and their dogs anyway? Get a life. I'd only give The New Yorkers one paw up.
Shelley Civkin is librarian and communications officer for Richmond Public Library.
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