{"id":8046,"date":"2014-10-03T00:12:16","date_gmt":"2014-10-03T07:12:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/?p=8046"},"modified":"2014-10-01T21:23:01","modified_gmt":"2014-10-02T04:23:01","slug":"my-rabbi-about-us-not-others","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/2014\/10\/03\/my-rabbi-about-us-not-others\/","title":{"rendered":"My Rabbi \u2013 about us, not others"},"content":{"rendered":"

Joel Bernbaum and Kayvon Kelly are good friends who\u2019ve drifted apart in My Rabbi<\/em>. (photo by Derek Ford)<\/em><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Religion, family, even something as innocuous as a book club or a sports team \u2013 any group to which we belong creates an \u201cus\u201d and a \u201cthem.\u201d Conversely, for most of us, not belonging anywhere, with anyone, leads to feelings of isolation, desperation. Finding space for \u201cthe other,\u201d being secure in oneself, these basic building blocks of healthy relationships, are at the core of My Rabbi<\/em>.<\/p>\n

When interviewed last month by the Jewish Independent<\/em> (jewishindependent.ca\/at-foundation-of-my-rabbi-is-friendship) co-creators Kayvon Kelly and Joel Bernbaum expressed the hope that their two-man play would raise more questions than it answers. It certainly does.<\/p>\n

The opening scene shows both men praying, Arya (played by Kelly) on his knees to Allah, Jacob (Bernbaum) adorned in tallit and tefillin to Hashem. Arya and Jacob are not religious extremists, however. Both have turned to religion in part because of the relationship they had with their respective fathers, they are both seeking meaning, but both still live in Canada, by choice \u2013 in Toronto no less, one of Canada\u2019s most multicultural cities \u2013 Jacob a Conservative rabbi, Arya still searching. They have drifted apart by the time the play begins and, when they happen to bump into each other again, the timing could not be worse \u2013 a synagogue in Toronto has just been bombed.<\/p>\n

This awkward reintroduction leads to a reunion over coffee and flashbacks to earlier, happier days of their friendship. Frat-boy humor offers breathing room in this intense 60-minute play, as, in addition to the current-day tensions, we see Arya and Jacob interacting with their fathers (each played by the other actor) in some emotional, identity-defining scenes. We witness how\/why Jacob becomes a rabbi with a strong sense of religious affiliation and Arya becomes more of a lost soul, his sense of identity not as clear.<\/p>\n

There is little female presence in this play. We find out that, while Arya\u2019s father was Muslim, his mother was Catholic, but other than sexist jokes at the pub about bar conquests, and catching up on the latest girlfriend status, women don\u2019t play a large role in these men\u2019s lives.<\/p>\n

The easiest assumption to make between this play and the larger world is that it is a commentary on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict or the larger \u201cclash of civilizations\u201d between extremist Islam and the rest of Islam and the West. However, these characters could belong to any group (religious or not) that leans to the insular.<\/p>\n

And, it\u2019s not really about this group versus that group, but about human beings in general, how a question asked at the wrong moment can end a years-long friendship, how selfish we can be in our own fear. It\u2019s about how we relate to each other, our susceptibility to outside forces, our evaluation of our self-worth.<\/p>\n

While based on Kelly and Bernbaum\u2019s own cultural backgrounds, it almost would have been nice if they had chosen characters that didn\u2019t already come with so much baggage. As the discussion after a Victoria show proved, we come to the play \u2013 as we come to anything else \u2013 with our own preconceptions, and even though the play is intended to elicit openness, some will find it hard to empathize with Jacob (i.e. Jews) or Arya (i.e. Muslims). There is such a strong human tendency, it seems, to lay blame.<\/p>\n

The title of the play doesn\u2019t help in this regard, as it sets viewers\u2019 expectations higher for the rabbi. And, it\u2019s misleading, as the play is not more about Jacob than Arya, Judaism over Islam. It\u2019s about two friends, any two friends, and it would be a shame if the play were considered relevant only to the Middle East conflict or how Jews and Muslims as groups may interact. Kelly and Bernbaum are asking us to consider our own personal motivations, actions and reactions, and are asking us to put ourselves not only in Jacob and Arya\u2019s places and consider what we would have done, but what we \u2013 not someone else \u2013 should have done.<\/p>\n

My Rabbi<\/em> is at Firehall Arts Centre<\/a> from Oct. 7-18.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Joel Bernbaum and Kayvon Kelly are good friends who\u2019ve drifted apart in My Rabbi. (photo by Derek Ford) Religion, family, even something as innocuous as a book club or a sports team \u2013 any group to which we belong creates an \u201cus\u201d and a \u201cthem.\u201d Conversely, for most of us, not belonging anywhere, with anyone, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":8019,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[785],"tags":[1203,1922,1923,2133],"class_list":["post-8046","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-performing-arts","tag-firehall-arts-centre","tag-joel-bernbaum","tag-kayvon-kelly","tag-my-rabbi"],"blocksy_meta":{"styles_descriptor":{"styles":{"desktop":"","tablet":"","mobile":""},"google_fonts":[],"version":8}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8046","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8046"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8046\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/8019"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8046"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8046"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8046"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}