\u201cThe first thing we asked them was, who did you see?\u201d Cohen said. \u201cWhat condition physically, mentally? And,\u00a0 <\/span>with this information, we brought a sign of life for some people who had no idea if their loved one was alive or not.\u201d<\/p>\n Some news was good, while other reports confirmed the worst fears of some families.<\/p>\n Cohen has trained soldiers for the potential of being held hostage and he was surprised that, without this sort of training, human instinct told some of the hostages how to respond.<\/p>\n A core trait among those who successfully survive such scenarios, he said, is hopeful certainty that they will be released. Too much optimism, though, can lead to crushing depression when hopes are not met. Those who are certain of imminent release or rescue may succumb to heartbreak and even give up on life as days and weeks tick by, he said.<\/p>\n It is necessary, Cohen said, to balance hope with realistic expectations.<\/p>\n A 16-year-old boy who was among the released hostages remembered the story of Gilad Shalit. The boy told himself: \u201cHow long was he in captivity? Five years. I\u2019m in for five years. A day less is a bonus.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cA 16-year-old kid,\u201d said Cohen. \u201cWow. What type of resilience is that? He didn\u2019t go through any POW training. He was just a 16-year-old Israeli boy and he\u2019s got that in his DNA.\u201d<\/p>\n Maintaining any sense of control or normalcy is a small victory. Some hostages counted the days and weeks by listening to the muezzin, the Muslim call to prayer, which is different on Fridays. A seven-year-old boy was given three dates to eat each day, and he kept the seeds to measure how many days he had been in captivity. Others made fun of their captors, secretly referring to them by disparaging names.<\/p>\n Generally speaking, Cohen explained, it is psychologically better for a hostage to be held with other captives, even if underground without natural light, than to be held above ground alone.<\/p>\n Also advantageous, Cohen said, is recognizing the captors as human beings.<\/p>\n \u201cThere is another person on the other side,\u201d he said. \u201cEven though we call Hamas animals or \u2026 monsters or whatever, the point is, they are human beings who can be influenced. When you realize that, that this is an interpersonal situation, that gives you power.\u201d<\/p>\n Cohen shared one story of hostages who told their captors, \u201cPut your gun down, you\u2019re scaring the children,\u201d and they did.<\/p>\n In another instance, a woman with a cardiac condition asked to get some exercise by walking down the tunnel she was held in. She came across two other hostages and asked why they couldn\u2019t be brought together. They were.<\/p>\n \u201cA lot of the hostages actually managed to bond with their captors and because of that bond they survived better,\u201d said Cohen.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n News of such incidents has led to unfortunate events, he said.<\/p>\n
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