{"id":43024,"date":"2023-12-15T01:39:43","date_gmt":"2023-12-15T09:39:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/?p=43024"},"modified":"2023-12-14T19:33:19","modified_gmt":"2023-12-15T03:33:19","slug":"stories-of-resilience-shared","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/2023\/12\/15\/stories-of-resilience-shared\/","title":{"rendered":"Stories of resilience shared"},"content":{"rendered":"

A family fleeing war, aided by acquaintances from a lifetime of hospitality. A person\u2019s choice to be the light in a dark world after a loved one was murdered. The creation of a vital medical resource as a tribute to a father who died too young. These three stories were shared at the event A Night of Hope, which was held at the Jewish Community Centre of Greater Vancouver Nov. 30. The three stories of resilience were intended to give hope in response to the trauma Jews worldwide have experienced since Oct. 7.<\/p>\n

Rabbi Susan Tendler, spiritual leader of Beth Tikvah Congregation in Richmond, shared \u201cthe unlikely story\u201d of how she became a rabbi, in part because of the trauma of having experienced the murder of a loved one.<\/p>\n

In the year 2000, she recalled, \u201cI was living my best life.\u201d She thought she knew who she would marry, she had a dream job as a teacher in Israel and was planning on making aliyah.<\/p>\n

\"photo<\/a>
Rabbi Susan Tendler (photo by Pat Johnson)<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

\u201cI returned to the United States to get my affairs in order before making the big move as the Second Intifada broke out,\u201d she said. Global conflict was compounded in the personal realm when her engagement was broken off. With foreign students avoiding Israel, her job was suddenly eliminated. Things began looking up, though, when she met Mike, \u201cwho showed me what partnership might look like.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd then, one night, he was brutally murdered,\u201d she said. Five young men, joyriding, had crashed a car and needed another vehicle.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey came upon Mike and murdered him, not even for his wallet. Just for fun,\u201d Tendler said. \u201cJust to take his car a few miles down the road before they ditched it.\u201d<\/p>\n

The murder plummeted her into depths of darkness.<\/p>\n

\u201cI couldn\u2019t understand how such palpable evil could exist in the world,\u201d she recalled. \u201cHow could a human being, created in the image of the divine, not understand life as sacred? What were the lives of those individuals that they didn\u2019t hold this basic value as truth? And, by doing so, those five young men took the sanctity out of this world for me, for Mike\u2019s family and his friends. I really didn\u2019t care to live in a world with such sheer evil. It wasn\u2019t that I was suicidal \u2013 I knew the difference and I wasn\u2019t \u2013 I just really didn\u2019t care to live or to die.\u201d<\/p>\n

She cited the Israeli poet Yehuda Amichai, who wrote that the Jewish people are \u201cinfected with hope.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe are taught to love others, to embrace others and to share our burdens with others,\u201d Tendler said. \u201cWe need not struggle alone…. So, as I held on, people rallied, surrounded me and guided me through the darkness.\u201d<\/p>\n

Overcoming this and other personal and geopolitical traumas led her to an important insight.<\/p>\n

\u201cI came to realize that, if I didn\u2019t like living in a world full of darkness and evil, then I needed to be the light,\u201d she said. \u201cI needed to choose life. I needed to choose hope and spread kindness, goodness and godliness to others.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe world needs us right now,\u201d she continued. \u201cWe all have hope coursing through our veins. Certainly, it has been weakened and doubted [since Oct. 7], but that is exactly what they want. We won\u2019t let them win. Let the light created by our hope and optimism join forces, knowing indeed that we are not alone and that this positive energy be magnified as it draws others in. May our light be a beacon for the world.\u201d<\/p>\n

Tanja Demajo, chief executive officer of Jewish Family Services, shared her family\u2019s history of survival in the Holocaust and the personal story of her family\u2019s escape from the post-Yugoslavia war in Bosnia, where she was born. She had not shared any of this publicly before.<\/p>\n

As a child in Mostar, young Tanja would often come home from school to find strangers at the table. Anyone passing through or needing hospitality was received in their house and welcomed with food.<\/p>\n

\"photo<\/a>
Tanja Demajo (photo by Pat Johnson)<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

\u201cMy family always kept the door open,\u201d she said. This openness, she believes, helped save her family when war exploded.<\/p>\n

In 1992, when she was 11-and-a-half, everything changed, seemingly in a day.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere were explosions everywhere, there was shooting everywhere, the army was everywhere,\u201d she said. \u201cThe city emptied.\u201d<\/p>\n

Getting away from the fighting was not easy. Roadblocks were set up by different militias and Demajo could see the fear in her father\u2019s expression as they confronted each successive barrier.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe had to stop at three different points and at three different points we came across some people that my parents knew through their life,\u201d she recalled. Keeping an open door meant there were people who knew the family and remembered their hospitality. \u201cIn each of these three situations, these friends came forward and put their lives on the line so they could let my family pass through.\u201d<\/p>\n

After the war ended, the family reconnected with her grandfather, who they had not seen in years.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat was the first time actually that my grandfather shared with us his own story,\u201d she said. From a community of 300, the grandfather and an uncle were the only survivors of the Holocaust.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

She asked him why he was so cheerful, despite all he had gone through.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe had this beautiful way of just hugging people and he would hug me and say, what are the things you remember as a child?\u201d She recalled spending weekends with her grandfather, the meals and stories they shared. \u201cAnd he said, well that\u2019s how you survive. Because those are the things that matter. The people you have in your life, the friendships that you share with them and the food you share with them.\u201d<\/p>\n

The connections she saw her parents forge at the table \u2013 which proved potentially lifesaving as the family fled war \u2013 are a lesson she has always carried. It is something that Jews worldwide can remember now, she said.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe need allies and we need to have these conversations to bring people together,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n

Jaime Stein shared the story of how the death his father, Howard Stein, in 2006, from acute leukemia, inspired him to help create Canada\u2019s first public<\/p>\n

\"photo<\/a>
Jaime Stein (photo by Pat Johnson)<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Early in the last decade, when Stein helped launch the $12.5 million campaign to create the facility, Canada was one of only two G-20 nations that did not have such a service. Umbilical cord blood contains blood-forming stem cells, which can renew themselves and differentiate into other types of cells.<\/p>\n

Working with Canadian Blood Services, Stein and the fundraising team for the project decided on a big focal point for the campaign \u2013 climbing Tanzania\u2019s Mount Kilimanjaro, the highest peak in Africa.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe got 25 people to sign up [to climb] and everybody had to raise a minimum of $10,000,\u201d Stein explained.<\/p>\n

Stein, in his 30s at the time, when $10,000 was a daunting sum, organized weekly 9 a.m. hikes with friends and strangers, at which he would offer career advice, listen to his hiking mates or otherwise engage, then write a blog post.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPeople started donating and people started telling their friends as well,\u201d he said.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

In the end, he raised $27,000, second only to the chief executive officer of Canadian Blood Services among the 25 climbers. Of course, the money turned out to be the easy part. They still had to ascend the mountain.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Like many others who climb tall mountains, Stein experienced altitude sickness \u2013 so severely he almost had to turn back.<\/p>\n

\u201cI could barely make it to camp,\u201d Stein recalls of the onset of the crisis. \u201cI just remember thinking about my dad, thinking of my family, thinking of the training, thinking of everything I did as I tried to get to camp.\u201d<\/p>\n

Slowly, his oxygen levels climbed and he was able to complete the trek.<\/p>\n

The trip itself raised $350,000 and, eventually, the team raised all the funds necessary. Canada now has a fully functioning umbilical cord blood bank, with four collection sites, including one in Vancouver.<\/p>\n

Alan Stamp, Jewish Family Services clinical director, and Ezra Shanken, chief executive officer of the Jewish Federation of Greater Vancouver, contextualized the stories as lessons in resilience community members can use to confront trauma.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A family fleeing war, aided by acquaintances from a lifetime of hospitality. A person\u2019s choice to be the light in a dark world after a loved one was murdered. The creation of a vital medical resource as a tribute to a father who died too young. These three stories were shared at the event A […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[22848,5810,22846,7702,3649,22847,22845,20545,8474,5412],"class_list":["post-43024","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-local","tag-blood-bank","tag-death","tag-jaime-stein","tag-jewish-family-services","tag-jewish-federation","tag-leukemia","tag-rabbi-susan-tendler","tag-resilience","tag-tanja-demajo","tag-war"],"blocksy_meta":{"styles_descriptor":{"styles":{"desktop":"","tablet":"","mobile":""},"google_fonts":[],"version":8}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/43024","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=43024"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/43024\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=43024"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=43024"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=43024"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}