{"id":40174,"date":"2022-12-09T02:00:17","date_gmt":"2022-12-09T10:00:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/?p=40174"},"modified":"2022-12-08T20:02:11","modified_gmt":"2022-12-09T04:02:11","slug":"a-new-family-tradition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/2022\/12\/09\/a-new-family-tradition\/","title":{"rendered":"A new family tradition"},"content":{"rendered":"

(photo by Mark Binder)<\/em><\/p>\n

Rachel Cohen stared at the full box of candles. Since her parents had separated, getting ready for Hanukkah wasn\u2019t the same. Four candles were broken. Of course.<\/p>\n

She chewed on her lower lip.<\/p>\n

In the old days, her family had gathered around the kitchen table, and argued about who would light the shammos and who would light the first candle.*<\/p>\n

\u201cYou did it last year,\u201d her twin brother Yakov always insisted.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo,\u201d Rachel would counter. \u201cI lit the shammos, which is better.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, it\u2019s not. The first candle is best.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cChildren, hush,\u201d their mother, Sarah, would say as she flipped a potato latke. \u201cYou\u2019ll disturb your father.\u201d<\/p>\n

Their father, Isaac, would be looking at his little book, pretending to mumble prayers, while holding back a smile.<\/p>\n

The compromise was always the same. Rachel would light the shammos, which was better, and Yakov would light the first candle, which made him happy, too.<\/p>\n

This year, her parents lived in different houses, and Hanukkah wouldn\u2019t be the same. Rachel didn\u2019t know what to do. She felt small, helpless and embarrassed.<\/p>\n

In the village of Chelm, 12-year-old Rachel Cohen was known as the smartest young girl, someone whose wisdom was both sought after and respected.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you don\u2019t know what to do,\u201d everyone said, \u201cask Rachel Cohen, and whatever she says, do that!\u201d<\/p>\n

Rachel knew that she wasn\u2019t really that brilliant. But whenever someone asked her a question, she either had the answer, or knew how or where to find it.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe secret of being wise,\u201d Rabbi Kibbitz had once taught her, \u201cis to listen quietly for as long as you can without saying anything. Ask a few questions, and then nod your head and wait until the answer arises. Most of the time, they\u2019ll think of it themselves, and then give you all the credit.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rachel nodded her head and asked herself, \u201cBut what does a so-called wise person do, when they don\u2019t know the answer?\u201d<\/p>\n

She looked around the kitchen, which was also silent.<\/p>\n

Then it came to her, and she smiled.<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

The bell over the door to Mrs. Chaipul\u2019s restaurant rang and, without looking up, the elderly woman behind the counter told Rachel, \u201cYour mother\u2019s gone to the market in Smyrna to get potatoes for the latkes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cCan we talk?\u201d Rachel asked quietly.<\/p>\n

Mrs. Chaipul glanced at the young girl, nodded her head and shouted, \u201cAll right, the restaurant is closed until lunch for a health and safety inspection!\u201d<\/p>\n

Most of the men finished drinking their tea or coffee, put on their coats and headed to the door.<\/p>\n

Reb Cantor the merchant didn\u2019t budge. \u201cI thought you already paid the health and safety inspector.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThis is for your health and safety,\u201d Mrs. Chaipul told the merchant. \u201cBecause I won\u2019t guarantee it if you stay.\u201d<\/p>\n

Reb Cantor smiled, stood and kissed Rachel on the top of her head as he left the restaurant.<\/p>\n

Mrs. Chaipul locked the door behind him and led Rachel to the table in back, where she\u2019d already placed two cups of hot herbal tea.<\/p>\n

The young girl and the old woman sat across from each other, lifted their cups at the same time, and blew.<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

Mrs. Chaipul listened as Rachel explained, \u201cOn the first night of Hanukkah, our family starts with eight candles ablaze, and then we light one fewer each night. This, my father says, echoes the Maccabees\u2019 fear that the oil in the eternal light might burn out at any moment.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut, on the last night, where there would only be one candle and the shammos, we changed the tradition and light all eight again. For us, the last night is a true celebration of joy. My mother says it\u2019s just nice to have all the extra lights.<\/p>\n

\u201cThis Hanukkah, Yakov and I are supposed to take turns, one night with Mama and the next with Papa. I want things to be the same, but no matter how hard I try to rearrange it, the number of candles always comes out uneven. Plus, four of our candles are already broken, which seems like a sign!\u201d<\/p>\n

Rachel waited for Mrs. Chaipul to tell her how to solve the problem. But Mrs. Chaipul didn\u2019t say anything. She was married to Rabbi Kibbitz, and kept her own name, which is another story. She\u2019d often chided her husband that it was better to keep your mouth shut than to put your foot into it.<\/p>\n

Rachel sighed. She sipped her tea.<\/p>\n

Then she smiled, and nodded. She suddenly knew what to do. \u201cThank you, Mrs. Chaipul. I need to hurry and buy more candles.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mrs. Chaipul gave Rachel a hug. \u201cI didn\u2019t do anything. But I wish you well.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rachel ran from the restaurant, and Mrs. Chaipul reopened the front door for the lunch crowd.<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

That year, Rachel Cohen changed their tradition again.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhether we are with mother or father,\u201d she told her brother, \u201cinstead of lighting eight or seven or one, each night we will take turns lighting all eight Hanukkah candles.\u201d<\/p>\n

Yakov was upset. \u201cSo many candles seems wasteful. And that isn\u2019t the way Hanukkah is supposed to be celebrated!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEverything changes,\u201d Rachel said, \u201cand it\u2019s up to us to make it new again. This way, the time we spend together will be even brighter.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAll right.\u201d Yakov shrugged. \u201cBut I light the first candle.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou did it last time.\u201d Rachel smiled. \u201cBut that\u2019s fine. Lighting the shammos is better\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n

Izzy Abrahmson<\/strong> is the author of <\/em>Winter Blessings and <\/em>The Village Twins. He\u2019s also a pen name for storyteller Mark Binder. Find the books on Amazon and Audible, with signed copies and links to the audio version of this story at izzyabe.com and markbinderbooks.com.<\/em><\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

*A note on candlelighting
\n<\/strong>A shammos is the candle that is used as a match to light the other candles. While most people follow the tradition of Rabbi Hillel, lighting one candle the first night of Hanukkah and then adding candles each night, the followers of Rabbi Shammai start with eight and work their way down. Rachel Cohen is not yet a rabbi, but who knows what the future will bring.
\n\u2013 IA<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(photo by Mark Binder) Rachel Cohen stared at the full box of candles. Since her parents had separated, getting ready for Hanukkah wasn\u2019t the same. Four candles were broken. Of course. She chewed on her lower lip. In the old days, her family had gathered around the kitchen table, and argued about who would light […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":40177,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[781],"tags":[2517,2648,21996,21777],"class_list":["post-40174","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-holidays","tag-chanukah","tag-chelm","tag-folk-tale","tag-hanukkah"],"blocksy_meta":{"styles_descriptor":{"styles":{"desktop":"","tablet":"","mobile":""},"google_fonts":[],"version":8}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40174","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=40174"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40174\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/40177"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=40174"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=40174"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=40174"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}