{"id":37596,"date":"2021-10-08T01:33:57","date_gmt":"2021-10-08T08:33:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/?p=37596"},"modified":"2021-10-06T17:55:23","modified_gmt":"2021-10-07T00:55:23","slug":"sometimes-we-need-a-break","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/2021\/10\/08\/sometimes-we-need-a-break\/","title":{"rendered":"Sometimes we need a break"},"content":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s been about a month since Labour Day and the start of school. For many people with school-age children, this is the first time the kids are back in<\/em> school, in person, in awhile. It\u2019s also been a year where we\u2019ve remarked about how \u201cearly\u201d the Jewish holidays are, in relation to the secular calendar. So, while some vaccinated people are thrilled to be attending their first hockey game or concert in almost two years, reveling in joining the crowds, many others are meeting this moment with caution and exhaustion.<\/p>\n

This balance of great enthusiasm at rejoining society and reticent caution is part of our identities. North Americans feel a great push to get out there, make money, join the in-crowd party and show off our productivity. Society often defines us by what we do and who we\u2019re with.<\/p>\n

The other side, the hesitancy, might be better understood by our Jewish ethnic and religious identities. That is, the people who want to follow the rules (ie. halachah<\/em>, Jewish law). We also find our way with caution perhaps because we suffered from thousands of years of refugee status and\/or trauma as we wandered.<\/p>\n

As a person who bore lots of childcare responsibilities, as well as losing some of my work life, this last month has been somewhat stressful and puzzling. From the moment my Grade 5 children left the house, I\u2019ve waited for the other shoe to drop. Will they get sent home sick? Will I land a new job or gig? If I do, how will I juggle it with what will happen next in our unpredictable pandemic world? In the short term, how can I cook ahead or prepare to meet the needs of the next Jewish holiday, day off school or Shabbat coming up?<\/p>\n

There\u2019s also a strong Puritan work ethic in my head, even though that\u2019s not my specific religious or ethnic background. It\u2019s something like: \u201cPeople who work hard are close to the Almighty. People who are close to the Almighty gain money, stature and professional accomplishments. Therefore, people who don\u2019t gain money, stature or accomplishments are neither close to the Almighty, nor working hard.\u201d<\/p>\n

Of course, many of us hear that if we didn\u2019t score the best job or earn the most, it\u2019s our own fault.<\/p>\n

On Tashlich, we thought about throwing away our metaphorical sins and aimed to do better in the new year. I reflected on how often negative and anxious thoughts race through my mind, and how I could try to reduce that. It\u2019s perhaps a first step to making space for more positivity and calm. It seemed like a good place to start.<\/p>\n

Yet, a month later, I catch myself thinking, \u201cHey, you\u2019ve had a month! Where\u2019s your newest freelance gig? What\u2019s the new work opportunity you\u2019ve landed?\u201d Of course, if the last month was spent on school readiness and putting challah and holiday meals on the table, this could just be anxious, negative self-talk. There\u2019s only so much a working parent can do.<\/p>\n

When we consider big concepts like our finances or how the law works, we\u2019re maybe not applying it to what\u2019s going on personally. For instance, the recent federal campaign promise of $10 a day childcare seemed like a dream come true for many \u2013 but, in reality, it\u2019s exactly like a dream that is out of reach the moment we wake up. For most people with children who need childcare, this plan, if it comes to fruition, won\u2019t be realized before our families age out of needing that care.<\/p>\n

All this was swirling in my head when I read my page of Talmud before bed. I\u2019m currently learning Beitzah<\/em> in my Daf Yom<\/em>i (page of Talmud a day). Yes, this is a tractate entitled \u201cEgg.\u201d It\u2019s all about what can and cannot be done on Jewish festivals (Pesach, Sukkot and Shavuot) as compared to a regular working day or on Shabbat. Its first issue is, \u201cMay we eat an egg laid on a festival day? Why or why not?\u201d<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s be honest, as a person who isn\u2019t strict about these rules, studying Beitzah is sometimes an intellectual exercise. It allows me to reflect on what these concerns mean in a broader context. It\u2019s more about how we make meaning out of holidays, the passage of time, and our struggles.<\/p>\n

Enter page 21 of Beitzah, where Rav Avya the Elder asks Rav Huna a complicated question. \u201cIf a Jewish person owns an animal with a non-Jew, what\u2019s the halachah with regard to slaughtering it on a festival?\u201d This is an issue because one can designate an animal to be killed to celebrate and eat on a holiday. The trouble is how to administer it with a non-Jewish partner, how to decide what rules to follow.<\/p>\n

Rav Huna responds, but Rav Avya asks him for clarification. Rav Huna says, no kidding, \u201cLook, a raven flies in the sky.\u201d HUH? Say what?<\/p>\n

Later talmudic commentators try to explain his response. Was Rav Huna trying to change the subject? Was he offering a critique or dismissing this question?<\/p>\n

Rav Huna\u2019s son is taken aback, according Rabbi Elliot Goldberg, who wrote an introduction to this page online at My Jewish Learning. Rav Huna\u2019s son pushes for an explanation. Rav Huna answers, \u201cWhat should I have done for him? Today I am in a state best described by the verse: \u2018Let me lean against the stout trunks, let me couch among the apple trees.\u2019 (Song of Songs 2:5) And he asked me about something that requires reasoning.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rav Huna basically says, \u201cHey, I\u2019m worn out and just need to hang out in the shade today, leave me alone!\u201d Even the best talmudic minds, who normally love to wrestle with complicated questions, need downtime, to recuperate. We can learn from Rav Huna that, sometimes, we should give ourselves a break \u2013 even when it seems unproductive or rude.<\/p>\n

The Gemara goes on to answer the question, it doesn\u2019t leave us hanging. Yet, Rav Huna offers a reminder for those of us who beat ourselves up over being uber productive. It\u2019s OK to cut ourselves some slack. Yes, we must balance our lives, abiding by laws, making a living, but also? We need to take a break at times.<\/p>\n

It turns out that sitting outside in nature isn\u2019t new-age, woo-woo self-care after all. We don\u2019t have to be \u201con\u201d all the time. If Rav Huna did it, approximately 1,750 years ago, we can, too. We can allow ourselves that moment to sit under a tree and recuperate. Here\u2019s to wishing you time in the orchard when you need it!<\/p>\n

Joanne Seiff <\/strong>has written regularly for CBC Manitoba and various Jewish publications. She is the author of three books, including <\/em>From the Outside In: Jewish Post Columns 2015-2016, a collection of essays available for digital download or as a paperback from Amazon. Check her out on Instagram @yrnspinner<\/a> or at joanneseiff.blogspot.com<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s been about a month since Labour Day and the start of school. For many people with school-age children, this is the first time the kids are back in school, in person, in awhile. It\u2019s also been a year where we\u2019ve remarked about how \u201cearly\u201d the Jewish holidays are, in relation to the secular calendar. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[20920,9609,20883,218,8302,2231],"class_list":["post-37596","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-op-ed","tag-beitzah","tag-daf-yomi","tag-gemara","tag-judaism","tag-lifestyle","tag-talmud"],"blocksy_meta":{"styles_descriptor":{"styles":{"desktop":"","tablet":"","mobile":""},"google_fonts":[],"version":8}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37596","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=37596"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37596\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=37596"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=37596"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=37596"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}