It\u2019s high time we changed the conversation. I know unequivocally that the whole world is sick of every conversation starting with: \u201cThe case numbers today.\u2026\u201d Or \u201cTwo people died today of COVID.\u201d Or \u201cI can\u2019t believe how many idiots wear their masks around their chin!\u201d Or \u201cI\u2019m so tired of COVID!\u201d<\/p>\n
Boo-Hoo. Enough ready!<\/p>\n
Full disclosure: I am 100% guilty of some or maybe even all of these statements. And tons more that I\u2019m too embarrassed to admit. It\u2019s been so long. Oops, there\u2019s another one. In my defence, I\u2019m trying to change the conversation. For instance, I\u2019ve caught myself saying, \u201cI\u2019m feeling hopeful today\u201d several times this week. I\u2019ve even been inspired to say \u201cThank you\u201d instead of \u201cWhy me?\u201d<\/p>\n
We are all human barometers. Our mercury rises and falls in direct relation to the medical experts\u2019 latest pronouncements. We hold our collective breath each time they opine. We hang on every word. And because their world rotates around COVID, ours does, too. But does it need to? The answer is a hard no.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s long past due to think thanks. In the past 18 months I can honestly say I\u2019m thankful for participating in Zoom classes every day; walking more; connecting with cousins I barely knew; and meeting new people on the virtual committees I attend.<\/p>\n
Thank you G-d for my community, my Torah learning and for endless opportunities to make life better. Thank you for allowing me to survive the pandemic. On second thought, just make that, thank you G-d.<\/p>\n
I acknowledge my gratitude. Also, my vulnerability and dependence on G-d. An avowed believer, I\u2019m not embarrassed to admit this. Even among avowed atheists and agnostics.<\/p>\n
What I want to say is this: it\u2019s time to celebrate. Not go-out-and-get-drunk celebrate. But, rather, celebrate the small victories. There are zillions of them. Or so I\u2019m told. I\u2019m guilty of seeing the defeats first, but I truly am working on it. Acknowledging this, here, now, I\u2019m humbled to realize that there are infinite lessons I need to learn.<\/p>\n
At a women\u2019s Torah study class I attended a few months ago (via Zoom, of course), the instructor posed some simple, yet profound, ideas. Juxtaposing anxiety and positive thinking, and how they relate to emunah<\/em> (faith in G-d) and bitachon<\/em> (trust in G-d), she suggested we look at struggles with a different mindset: \u201cWhat\u2019s the opportunity here?\u201d If you are a Torah-believing Jew, you know that there\u2019s a purpose in whatever G-d throws at us, as individuals and as a collective.<\/p>\n On a personal level, we just have to figure out what that purpose is. Sounds simple, right? Not. Even. A. Little.\u00a0 As the instructor suggested, if we turn our habitual thinking around, we might just be able to parse the purpose. In other words, whatever happens to me, it was G-d\u2019s idea, so what do I do with it? How can I maximize my potential? What\u2019s being asked of me? While the world and its vagaries seem random, they\u2019re far from it.<\/p>\n Life will actually become easier if I stop fearing unknown and challenging situations, and accept that there is always a purpose there. Of course, that\u2019s easy to do when things are going well, but the minute I feel threatened or scared, my anxiety and fear goes from zero to 100 in seconds.<\/p>\n Faced with terrible tragedy, it seems impossible to believe that G-d takes care of us all the time. If He did, why would people be faced with horrific situations that rob them of loved ones, threaten their health and jeopardize their livelihoods, etc.? At times like this, our emunah and bitachon face their biggest hurdles.<\/p>\n How many times have I heard the phrase tracht gut vet zein gut <\/em>(think good and it will be good)? On the face of it, brilliant. In reality, next to impossible. Notice I didn\u2019t say downright impossible. It\u2019s impossible-adjacent. I try it on occasion, but have difficulty with the carry-through. I assume it\u2019s more of a fake-it-till-you-make-it kind of thing that needs to be hauled out of the closet more than once a month. I must start wearing my rubber bracelet with the saying stamped on it.<\/p>\n There are always more questions than answers. What is this ____ (fill in the blank) meant to teach me? What does G-d want from me? How can I stretch myself spiritually, emotionally and intellectually? How can I turn this situation around to find something positive here?<\/p>\n In my 65 years, if I\u2019ve learned one thing, it\u2019s that life is a series of journeys, rather than a destination. Or, to use an analogy my father, z\u2019l, favoured: life is like swimming in the ocean. You swim and struggle and get tired. Then, you reach a little island where you can rest and gather your strength. But the water starts rising and you have to start swimming again. So, you begin the process all over.<\/p>\n I guess the message here is to enjoy the short stints on the little islands of calm. Appreciate them, embrace them, then prepare for more challenges. I guess the trick is to look for more islands and steer ourselves in that direction. How hard can it be?<\/p>\n Hmm\u2026. I\u2019ll let you know once I dry off.<\/p>\n I have few, if any, answers. However, it\u2019s probably more important to ponder the questions than pontificate about things. Humility trumps arrogance, after all. Like the saying goes, the more we learn, the more we realize how little we know. We can remedy that somewhat with some good old inquisitiveness, a dash of openness, an attitude of show-me and, well, you might just find one of those islands. Or, at the very least, float for awhile, while you enjoy the sun on your face.<\/p>\n Just remember to always wear sunscreen.<\/p>\n Shelley Civkin<\/strong> is a happily retired librarian and communications officer. For 17 years, she wrote a weekly book review column for the <\/em>Richmond Review. She\u2019s currently a freelance writer and volunteer.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" It\u2019s high time we changed the conversation. I know unequivocally that the whole world is sick of every conversation starting with: \u201cThe case numbers today.\u2026\u201d Or \u201cTwo people died today of COVID.\u201d Or \u201cI can\u2019t believe how many idiots wear their masks around their chin!\u201d Or \u201cI\u2019m so tired of COVID!\u201d Boo-Hoo. Enough ready! 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