{"id":22447,"date":"2016-12-23T01:50:08","date_gmt":"2016-12-23T09:50:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/?p=22447"},"modified":"2016-12-21T11:43:11","modified_gmt":"2016-12-21T19:43:11","slug":"illness-not-weakness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/2016\/12\/23\/illness-not-weakness\/","title":{"rendered":"Illness, not weakness"},"content":{"rendered":"

Can We Talk About … event committee, left to right: Karen Dana (event co-chair), Jenn Ritter (event co-chair), Harriet Zimmer, Rietta Floom, Einat Paz-Keynan (JCFS staff), Meytal Lavy (JCFS staff), Michael Landsberg, Sherry Lercher-Davis, Randee Pollock (JCFS staff), Danita Aziza (JCFS board chair), Pam Vine, Tara Greenberg and Jill Atnikov. (photo from Jewish Child and Family Service Winnipeg)<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

On Nov. 3, as part of Jewish Child and Family Service Winnipeg\u2019s series Can We Talk About …, TSN celebrity Michael Landsberg spoke about Darkness and Hope \u2013 Depression, Sports and Me.<\/p>\n

Landsberg has suffered from anxiety for as long as he can remember, and depression for the past 18 years.<\/p>\n

\u201cIn 2009, I spoke about it publicly for the first time,\u201d Landsberg shared with those gathered at Shaarey Zedek Synagogue. \u201cI told everybody I knew. I just hadn\u2019t used the platforms available to me to discuss it [until then], because I didn\u2019t think it was relevant to anyone\u2019s life.<\/p>\n

\u201cOne day, when I was, by chance, interviewing someone who had suffered from depression, I asked him about it. I commented that I, too, had suffered. The next day changed my life.\u201d<\/p>\n

Landsberg received emails from people saying that the interview had been the first time they had heard two men discussing their struggles with depression; in particular, without sounding embarrassed or seeming weak.<\/p>\n

\u201cBecause of that, they said their lives were changed,\u201d said Landsberg. \u201cSince that moment, I\u2019ve tried to do exactly the same thing over and over again in as many venues as I can, including in Winnipeg.\u201d<\/p>\n

Landsberg tries to find ways to bring the topic to the fore whenever he feels it\u2019s appropriate or thinks he has the opportunity to make a difference, whether it\u2019s a public talk he\u2019s headlining or a discussion on radio, TV or the internet.<\/p>\n

\u201cEvery time I say I suffer from this illness and I\u2019m not ashamed, embarrassed or weak, it changes someone\u2019s life,\u201d he said. \u201cMy coming out gave a purpose to this illness. It allowed me to take this poison that\u2019s been inside me, that\u2019s detracted from my life…. It allowed me to help someone else … so my poison is someone else\u2019s medicine. That makes me feel good and makes me feel like I have a place in the world other than the one I was occupying before.\u201d<\/p>\n

According to Landsberg, before going public, his level of contribution to society was neutral, like most people\u2019s. But, since coming out and talking about how his depression makes him feel and how it robs his self-confidence and self-esteem \u2013 yet he\u2019s not ashamed of it \u2013 he\u2019s no longer neutral.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think what I have to share most of all is me,\u201d he said. \u201cThe more deep I go, the more details I give, the more of my struggles \u2013 not just that I\u2019m struggling, but how my struggles feel \u2013 the more valuable it is to someone else. You want people to say, in the audience, \u2018That\u2019s me.\u2019 And \u2018Oh my gosh. My husband has that illness and I never knew that\u2019s what was going on in his head. I understand better now.\u2019<\/p>\n

\u201cI think we\u2019re in a time now when every person is really deciding what side of history they\u2019re on. Do you want to be on the side of history that\u2019s changed the way we deal with mental health or do you want to be on the other side? I try to encourage people to get on the right side of it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Landsberg has always been a sharer and encourages others to share their struggles. As there is a deep sense of hopelessness and loneliness when it comes to depression, he said it is critical to encourage others to listen and realize they are not alone with the illness.<\/p>\n

\u201cMore so than any event than I\u2019ve ever been to, I was riveted and was really grabbed by several of the questions [posed to me in Winnipeg],\u201d Landsberg told the Independent<\/em>. \u201cThey weren\u2019t so much questions as they were statements about audience members\u2019 own situations.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you have a good night and you do it the right way, and there\u2019s an audience that\u2019s engaged that way, you\u2019ll hear stories that have never before been shared \u2013 empowering people to share.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy analogy is always, what I\u2019d really like to do, is to have everyone in Canada who suffers from this illness [get together] \u2013 in the basement of a synagogue or a church, where Alcoholic Anonymous meetings take place \u2013 and [have] each of us draw from the collective strength and, at the same time, make deposits into that strength. When you turn to someone for help, you ultimately give them strength just by asking for it. That\u2019s the spirit we felt in Winnipeg.\u201d<\/p>\n

One female audience member shared that she has had cancer and that it has come back, adding that she has suffered from depression for 15 years. Landsberg recalled, \u201cShe said, \u2018You know, I have to be honest with you, I\u2019ll take the cancer over the depression.\u2019<\/p>\n

\u201cAlso, an army veteran shared that he served in the army for 12 years and that, when he returned to Canada, there were 13 of them in his army group who had served and that, now, there are only two \u2013 the other 11 took their own lives. He said, \u2018I was in the closet, so to speak, and felt desperately alone and unable to reach out. I watched a TV show you [Landsberg] did two years ago and thought, wow, if he can share, I can, too.\u2019<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s enough reason to keep doing this for the rest of my life \u2013 just the knowledge that doing something that\u2019s so easy for me, takes no effort, is a joy, [is helping]. To get up on stage and use my struggles for someone else\u2019s benefit … it\u2019s so easy, yet the payoff can be so massive.\u201d<\/p>\n

When it comes to helping a loved one who suffers from depression, Landsberg said one should start by admitting they cannot fully understand, as they have never had the disease. Then, they should ask their loved one what they want from them.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s a huge thing \u2013 telling me what not to do,\u201d said Landsberg. \u201cThe second thing is to reduce guilt. Many of us who have this illness like to please those around us. But, when we\u2019re sick, we lose that ability, because we\u2019re not ourselves \u2013 we can\u2019t. I feel terribly guilty when I\u2019m not the person I want to be.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe people around me aren\u2019t living their lives better because I\u2019m there. Quite the opposite. I feel terrible that I\u2019m actually worrying them, that I\u2019m actually making the room worse because I\u2019m in it. But, if you reduce my guilt, it will make a difference.\u201d<\/p>\n

As for someone who discovers they have the disease, Landsberg suggested education, as the more one knows about one\u2019s illness, the more they can be an advocate and fight.<\/p>\n

\u201cThen, establish the thought that I will fight for my happiness,\u201d he said. \u201cAnd that\u2019s incredibly difficult to commit to because the illness takes the life, the drive, out of us. It makes us apathetic. It makes us really incapable of doing stuff, or highly challenged to do stuff.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you commit to fighting for your happiness, that\u2019s a big step. If you commit to sharing, that\u2019s a big step. Sharing is incredibly difficult for most people because they feel shame and embarrassment. They feel like their illness is a weakness.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou can overcome that, to some extent, by educating yourself. When you go on the internet and Google \u2018depression\u2019 and get five billion hits, you realize that 10% of the population right now may be feeling similar to you.<\/p>\n

\u201cPeople take their lives \u2013 4,000 every year in Canada, 40,000 in the United States, and there are 25 attempts likely for every \u2018successful\u2019 suicide … that means 100,000 suicide attempts. We know there\u2019s at least 10 to one that think about suicide, but don\u2019t attempt it; suicide becomes appealing to them and plays out over and over in their brain.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you start realizing you\u2019re just like a million other people in this country, then you\u2019ll realize this is a sickness, not a weakness. All of these people, people that take their lives because they\u2019re in so much pain, that\u2019s not weakness.\u201d<\/p>\n

Landsberg added that speaking with someone who you know is struggling with depression is the easiest way to start sharing and healing, as you know they will not judge you and that they understand you.<\/p>\n

\u201cWinnipeg people liked what I did, so they went home with something,\u201d said Landsberg. \u201cBut, I think I went home with more. I took away more than I left. What I took away were stories from people who I felt privileged to listen to\u2026. I just loved it.\u201d<\/p>\n

For more information, visit sicknotweak.com<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Rebeca Kuropatwa<\/strong> is a Winnipeg freelance writer.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Can We Talk About … event committee, left to right: Karen Dana (event co-chair), Jenn Ritter (event co-chair), Harriet Zimmer, Rietta Floom, Einat Paz-Keynan (JCFS staff), Meytal Lavy (JCFS staff), Michael Landsberg, Sherry Lercher-Davis, Randee Pollock (JCFS staff), Danita Aziza (JCFS board chair), Pam Vine, Tara Greenberg and Jill Atnikov. (photo from Jewish Child and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":22431,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[4631,2864,4434,6637,6636,4048],"class_list":["post-22447","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-national","tag-depression","tag-health","tag-jcfs","tag-michael-landsberg","tag-tsn","tag-winnipeg"],"blocksy_meta":{"styles_descriptor":{"styles":{"desktop":"","tablet":"","mobile":""},"google_fonts":[],"version":8}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22447","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22447"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22447\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/22431"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22447"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22447"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22447"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}