{"id":16282,"date":"2015-12-04T00:19:58","date_gmt":"2015-12-04T08:19:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/?p=16282"},"modified":"2015-12-04T00:09:49","modified_gmt":"2015-12-04T08:09:49","slug":"ordinary-holiday-in-chelm","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/2015\/12\/04\/ordinary-holiday-in-chelm\/","title":{"rendered":"Ordinary holiday in Chelm"},"content":{"rendered":"

Reb Cantor and Rabbi Yohon Abrahms paused at the top of the hill to watch the sun spread its warm red rays in a growing embrace across the Black Forest. (photo by Rainer L\u00fcck via commons.wikimedia.org)<\/em><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

It was an ordinary Chanukah in the village of Chelm, which was strange. Depending on who you talk to, Chelm is called a village of fools or of wise people, and there\u2019s always something going wrong. This year, however … it was quiet.<\/p>\n

Chanukah was neither early nor late. The weather was good \u2013 not too cold and not too hot. There was enough food so no one was hungry, and the lands surrounding Chelm were at peace; the Cossacks were far away. And, for once, no one got into an argument over whether the Americans should spell the holiday with an \u201cH\u201d or a \u201cCh.\u201d<\/p>\n

On the first night of Chanukah, families gathered and lit their candles according to the traditions of Hillel or Shammai, depending on whether they felt like building up to a big finish or starting off bright and getting more relaxed as each day passed.<\/p>\n

\u201cSomething is going to happen,\u201d worried Reb Cantor the merchant, as he huffed and puffed his way up Sunrise Hill for his morning exercise with Rabbi Yohon Abrahms, the schoolteacher.<\/p>\n

\u201cSomething always happens,\u201d said the young rabbi.<\/p>\n

\u201cSomething bad,\u201d said Reb Cantor. \u201cIt\u2019s too quiet.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot when you\u2019re breathing so hard,\u201d said Rabbi Yohon Abrahms.<\/p>\n

They paused at the top of the hill to watch the sun spread its warm red rays in a growing embrace across the Black Forest.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m still concerned,\u201d said Reb Cantor.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou wouldn\u2019t be you if you weren\u2019t,\u201d said the young rabbi.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll race you to Mrs. Chaipul\u2019s restaurant.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut you always win!\u201d said Reb Cantor.<\/p>\n

It was too late. The young rabbi was already running, and the fat merchant had no choice but to trundle after, hoping that he wouldn\u2019t trip, fall and roll down the hill like a barrel.<\/p>\n

By the time Reb Cantor caught up, Rabbi Abrahms was busy playing a friendly game with Joseph Katz, a well-known dreidel shark. Instead of wagering raisins on who would win, everyone was betting about how many coffee cups and teacups Joseph could rebound a dreidel off before landing on whatever letter he chose.<\/p>\n

\u201cWatch this,\u201d Joseph said with a twinkle. He twirled a square top onto the table, where it ricocheted back and forth, striking five mugs and three cups before flying up, hovering over Rabbi Kibbitz\u2019s plate of latkes, and then splashing down into the rabbi\u2019s apple sauce.<\/p>\n

\u201cNun!\u201d said Joseph. \u201cI win.\u201d (In Chelm, foolish as it is, they say it takes nun to win.)<\/p>\n

\u201cYou always do,\u201d said Rabbi Kibbitz, who fished out the dreidel and wiped it off with a napkin before returning it to the young man.<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry about that,\u201d Joseph said.<\/p>\n

Rabbi Kibbitz shrugged. \u201cI\u2019ve always felt that apple sauce is more of a garnish than a necessity.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow can you eat those latkes?\u201d whispered Reb Stein, the baker. \u201cI know you love your wife, but\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mrs. Chaipul, the rabbi\u2019s wife (she kept her own name, which is another story) was listening from the kitchen to see how her husband would answer.<\/p>\n

As the owner of the only kosher restaurant in Chelm, she was known as a miracle worker in the kitchen, with the exception of her lead-sinker matzah balls and her notoriously lethal latkes.<\/p>\n

She knew, as did everyone in Chelm, that she had something of a culinary blind spot when it came to potato pancakes. She\u2019d solved the problem at the annual Chanukah party by enlisting the help of Mrs. Rosen and her daughters, but her husband insisted that she still make her old recipe for him.<\/p>\n

Rabbi Kibbitz smiled. \u201cFirst of all, my stomach is protected by my belief in God.\u201d<\/p>\n

Everyone in the restaurant rolled their eyes.<\/p>\n

\u201cSecondly, it\u2019s a question of scale,\u201d he said. \u201cWhen she cooks a small batch just for me, they\u2019re quite good.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cReally?\u201d Reb Stein said.<\/p>\n

\u201cWould you like a taste?\u201d the rabbi said, raising a piece on his fork.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, no, no, no!\u201d Reb Stein said, hastily backing away. \u201cI have work to do today.\u201d<\/p>\n

Even Reb Cantor, who had caught his breath by then, joined in as Reb Stein fled from the restaurant ahead of a wave of laughter.<\/p>\n

Every night for seven more nights, candles were lit and the stories of the Maccabees were told. Songs were sung, dreidels spun, and latkes and doughnuts were fried.<\/p>\n

More and more families were following the Schlemiel\u2019s tradition of giving Chanukah presents to each other, but it wasn\u2019t to excess. No one fought over whose present was best or biggest. And everyone remembered to give a little extra gelt to Rabbi Abrahms the schoolteacher to honor his contribution to their children\u2019s lives.<\/p>\n

On the last night it snowed, but everyone was home safe. They looked out their windows at the falling flakes, glad of their walls and roofs, and warmed themselves in front of their fires. And, as the candles finally burned down, the children were tucked into bed beneath comforters and blankets with a final goodnight kiss.<\/p>\n

It was an ordinary Chanukah in the village of Chelm.<\/p>\n

For once, nothing bad happened and nothing went wrong.<\/p>\n

And that in itself was a miracle.<\/p>\n

The End.<\/p>\n

Mark Binder\u00a0<\/strong>is the author of the award-winning Life in Chelm series, which includes<\/em> A Chanukah Present, The Brothers Schlemiel and<\/em> Matzah Mishugas. His latest book is<\/em> Cinderella Spinderella. A professional storyteller, he regularly performs at synagogues, Jewish community centres and the National Yiddish Book Centre.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Reb Cantor and Rabbi Yohon Abrahms paused at the top of the hill to watch the sun spread its warm red rays in a growing embrace across the Black Forest. (photo by Rainer L\u00fcck via commons.wikimedia.org) It was an ordinary Chanukah in the village of Chelm, which was strange. Depending on who you talk to, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":16283,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[781],"tags":[2517,2648],"class_list":["post-16282","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-holidays","tag-chanukah","tag-chelm"],"blocksy_meta":{"styles_descriptor":{"styles":{"desktop":"","tablet":"","mobile":""},"google_fonts":[],"version":8}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16282","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16282"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16282\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/16283"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16282"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16282"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jewishindependent.ca\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16282"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}