children – Jewish Independent

Run to reduce poverty

Esther Edel (right) has participated in the Run 4 Afikim twice. (photo from Esther Edel)

The annual Run 4 Afikim supports Afikim, a nonprofit organization in Israel that addresses child poverty. One of the participants in the run – for two consecutive years now – has been former Vancouverite Esther Edel.

Jerusalem-based Afikim was founded in 2008 by Israeli educator and child services administrator Moshe Lefkowitz. At the moment, Afikim staff helps 528 impoverished children in 14 learning centres throughout Israel, mainly in Jerusalem.

Afikim’s approach is to help parents as well, providing family counseling, while the children receive hot meals, tutoring, life skills training and emotional support. Currently, Afikim cannot keep up with the demand for its services, and Lefkowitz would like to see the number of students Afikim accepts increase by 80 this year.

One of the ways Afikim raises funds is the Run 4 Afikim. The website describes the event as a non-competitive relay from Jerusalem to Eilat, totaling 370 kilometres in 36 hours. Participants run in groups of three. Each group completes one leg of nine to 14 kilometres at a time and each runner ends up running multiple legs over the 36 hours. Participants must raise a minimum of $2,000 each to take part.

This year, the Run 4 Afikim began on Jan. 9 and ended on Jan. 11. The event raised more than $265,000, exceeding its goal of $250,000. One of the participants was Edel, who made aliyah in 1997.

“I had a strong religious Zionist education, which contributed to my moving to Israel.… My parents and sister still live in Vancouver. Unfortunately, I do not visit them as often as I would like,” shared Edel in an email interview with the Independent.

While Edel first participated in Run 4 Afikim last year, it wasn’t her first long-distance run.

“I’ve always been active, since I was little. Non-competitive sports and any outdoor activity are parts of my day-to-day life. I’ve participated in numerous 10-kilometre runs over the years. Most of them have been in Jerusalem, as parts of the annual Jerusalem Marathon, generally as fundraisers for different organizations.”

She was introduced to Afikim, she said, “via a good friend, Ruchie Schwartz, who already participated in the run. She had posted on Facebook the recap/promo video of the previous year’s run. When I watched it, I was moved by the passion of the participants and, even more so, by the cause that was driving them to raise funds and awareness for the Afikim Family Enrichment programs.”

The weekly programs include music, sports and other extracurricular activities. “While these types of pursuits are easily available for children from more privileged backgrounds,” explains the website, “Afikim’s children would have no access to them without this program. Like all facets of Afikim, extracurricular activities help close the achievement gap between disadvantaged children and those from higher socioeconomic backgrounds.”

Edel wanted to participate in the Run 4 Afikim but had some doubts. “I was slightly hesitant, as I had taken a break from running for a bit and wasn’t sure if I would get back into it,” she said.

photo - Esther Edel at this year’s run — Esther Edel at this year’s run. *(photo from Esther Edel)*

But those doubts were easily overcome. “I added a few runs to my weekly workout schedule, which I had not consistently been doing before I decided to participate,” she said.

To meet the $2,000 financial contribution requirement, she fundraised using email, connected with people on Facebook, contacted friends by other means and benefited from word of mouth.

“This year, there were eight groups and 32 segments divided between the groups,” she said about the run. “My team ran five segments, which approximately totaled 48 kilometres over 36 hours. Due to the timing of the segments, all the groups were functioning on very little sleep throughout the run. It’s mainly 36 hours where adrenaline and endurance get you through.”

Edel’s team schedule included, on the Wednesday evening, one run from the Jerusalem starting point, and three running segments on the Thursday, the first starting at 5:30 a.m., the second at 2:30 p.m. and the third at 10:45 p.m. “Friday morning, we started at 6 a.m. and most of the participants completed the final few kilometres to Eilat,” she said.

Edel added, “It’s important to note that it is purely volunteer-based, with the maximum effort to keep the overhead as low as possible.… Throughout the run, there are always one or two escorts, including trained paramedics, who also volunteer their time each year to drive the roadside escort.”

Edel also mentioned the lunch on the Thursday, which was “an organized activity, with all the runners and some of the Afikim children. This allowed us to connect with the Afikim kids and see firsthand how this run and fundraising affect these children.”

To learn more about Afikim’s work, visit afikim.org.

Olga Livshin is a Vancouver freelance writer. She can be reached at [email protected].

Teaching entrepreneurship

Students at the Bachar school in Even Yehuda, which educates for leadership and entrepreneurship, prepare to welcome a delegation of educators from developing countries, who came to learn how Israeli schools educate for entrepreneurship. (photo from Galit Zamler)

For Galit Zamler, a course that began as a volunteer position at one school has become a full-time job, with more and more schools picking up her program.

In 2009, when Zamler’s third child was in Grade 6, his school principal wanted to have an after-school activity. She brought representatives of a company that was not only expensive to hire, but would only present to outstanding students, and required at least 20 of them.

Seeing the value of educating kids about entrepreneurship, Zamler – who has an MBA and has co-founded two businesses – told the principal that she would do such a presentation at no charge, as long as her son could be one of the participants. A month later, Zamler was teaching her first group of 12 children. She knew she was onto something great after she had sent the students’ parents notes about what was being taught, and the parents responded with thank you letters.

Word spread and, after volunteering for six years, Zamler turned her volunteer work into a full-time career. Now, 10 years into it, she said, “At the beginning of the course, I’d count each one of them, but now there are a lot of schools and there’s awareness of the need to teach entrepreneurship. I don’t need to go and try to convince anyone. They are going out looking for it.”

One of the first things Zamler teaches is that there are different kinds of entrepreneurs. It is not strictly about entrepreneurs of technology or inventions, and it is not just about opening a business. Students are taught that, to succeed, one must stand out from others – be creative and make their initiative unique.

“Then, they raise ideas and learn that there are no bad ideas,” said Zamler. “Each idea can be good and that’s how we do it. Being critical will prevent others from raising ideas. It’s very important that the class be open-minded and let everyone, whatever their idea, say it aloud and learn to explain it. Sometimes, what they have in their head is not clear to the others. They learn to stand in front of the class and explain their ideas.

“It’s not that every idea is great,” she clarified. “It’s just that we won’t criticize ideas. We ask questions to understand, and we discuss what difficulties we see in ideas – things like, how much it will cost, who will need it, to take a good look at it.

“Sometimes, this makes the student drop an idea, because they understand it can’t be implemented…. For example, there was a student who said she wanted every student to have a cupboard in the class to put their books into. The kids asked where she would put them, with very little space. And, she realized it couldn’t be done.”

photo - Sixth graders at the Hayovel school in Ashdod present their social project: A Birthday to Everyone — Sixth graders at the Hayovel school in Ashdod present their social project: A Birthday to Everyone. *(photo from Galit Zamler)*

Once all the ideas are shared with the class, students start to determine which ones they like the most and come up with business plans – tackling the process like a cake recipe, considering which ingredients they will need to bring their concepts to life. This includes the physical elements, as well as how to make their business unique, part of which involves seeking advice from experts in various fields to see if any changes might be needed.

Only then do the students try to implement their project, which can sometimes be as simple as composing a letter to the municipality.

“I have a school that wanted to have a gym,” said Zamler. “But, the school is small and there’s no place. So, they wrote a letter. The municipality sent an expert to explain why it can’t be done, but gave them money to buy equipment for activities they can move from place to place; using it outside and bringing it back inside as needed. And, they were satisfied with this.”

The curriculum is offered to grades 2 through 9 in Israel and it is funded in part by the government, as principals are allowed some leeway to allocate funds as they see fit within a list of external programs pre-approved by the Ministry of Education.

“Sometimes, they teach it as a science class,” said Zamler. “Other times, it is categorized as a life skills lesson in the curriculum … and, when the school principal thinks it’s important, he or she finds a way.”

Zamler – and other parents – consider the entrepreneurship course a great addition to what is being taught in school, as it will help in practically every aspect of life.

“I think, sometimes, it’s the parents that bring the program to the schools, because they know that children learn something useful for life … not just the ordinary curriculum,” which includes things that may not “help them when they grow up, as things change so quickly,” said Zamler.

Even armed with this entrepreneurial knowledge, Zamler acknowledged that the overwhelming majority of students – 90% to 95% – will end up as employees. But, she is hoping they will be leader employees.

“I was an employee with entrepreneur skills, and that’s what helped me go from the bottom up to management,” she said. “Being an entrepreneur in an organization means that you think big, you do more than you are told. Those are the kinds of workers we need in the workforce.”

While Zamler has not yet conducted follow-up studies on the students who have taken the program, other countries are taking note and looking for ways to implement the program in their own schools.

“The foreign office brings delegations to Israel twice a year and takes them to a school that educates for entrepreneurship,” said Zamler. “And what we see is that, instead of students who don’t like to go to school, we see students who are really enjoying their time in school, because they have choices.

“The army is also looking for these kinds of students…. If they don’t have these kinds of skills – persistence, creativity, and working on team goals – the army doesn’t want them. We know it helps them in the future, in the army and, I think, the workforce.”

The Hebrew Academy in Miami Beach was the first school outside of Israel to implement the program. Also, a company from Hong Kong has purchased the licence to bring the program there.

“They do amazing things there and they’re opening more and more classes,” Zamler said of Hong Kong. “But, there, it is an after-school activity, because it’s hard to bring it into the public school curriculum.”

Zamler has created an online training program for both students and teachers wanting to bring entrepreneurship into their school. For more information, visit tomorrowsuccess.com.

Rebeca Kuropatwa is a Winnipeg freelance writer.

Connect gifts to holiday

Gifts can range from superhero socks to a journal to time with family and friends.

“When you consider the meaning of Chanukah, it’s about the Jewish struggle to maintain observance within a non-Jewish world,” writes Deena Yellin in the article “To gift or not to gift” on chabad.org. “The Maccabees’ victory was not just a military triumph but a win over assimilation as they succeeded in preserving the Jewish tradition. Chanukah presents a wonderful opportunity to convey the message of maintaining a strong identity despite outside pressures.”

In Yellin’s household, they “get out the Chanukah box filled with homemade decorations featuring menorahs and Maccabees that the children made in previous years…. We hang them up in our windows and around the candlelighting area. After all, publicizing the miracle is a big part of celebrating Chanukah.”

As well, every child lights their own chanukiyah, often one they’ve made themselves, and they invite people over. “One of the best ways to show children the beauty of the holiday is by sharing it with friends and relatives.”

Of course, food – latkes, sufganiyot and other deep-fried treats – is part of the celebration, as are games and crafts. Even gift-giving games. “One of my friends,” writes Yellin, “holds a ‘Mystery Maccabee’ project in which everyone picks the name of a family member from a hat so that they only need to buy a gift for that person. At their annual Chanukah party, everyone has fun guessing who got whose gift.”

Finally, many people use “Chanukah as an opportunity to teach their children to think of others who are less fortunate. One way to do this is by encouraging them to donate one of their gifts or some of their gelt to sick or needy children. Other philanthropic options are donating non-perishable items to a local food pantry or volunteering in a soup kitchen.”

***

Sarah Zadok, also in an article published on chabad.org (“Is giving Chanukah presents a non-Jewish custom?”), notes, “The word Chanukah shares a root with the word l’chanech or chinuch, which means ‘to mold’ or ‘to educate.’ Education, especially the education of children, is the foundation of what we celebrate on Chanukah.”

She allows that it is possible to educate and “to highlight the meaning of Chanukah through gift-giving. For example, giving your kids books or tapes or videos about the story of Chanukah…. Or, by drawing attention to the concept of the triumph of light over darkness – another powerful theme of the Chanukah story – you could invite your kids to bring ‘light’ where it is dark. You could, for example, make a project and bring it to a retirement home and brighten up someone’s day, or hand out cookies or latkes or winter coats to homeless people, or teach another Jew about our Chanukah traditions and invite them in to make a blessing over the candles with you.”

***

In the forward.com article “8 days of meaningful Hanukkah giving,” Shanee Markovitz writes, “it’s not about what we give as much as why we are giving it.” She offers night-by-night suggestions based on different themes.

Night 1 (Jewish values and roots): gifts like Chanukah Mad Libs for kids or a gift card to a Judaica store for adults.

Night 2 (self-care): for kids, tablets that change the colour of bath water; for adults, essential oils for the bath or a massage.

Night 3 (dream big): for all ages, a journal or a pillow and/or pillowcase.

Night 4 (family and friends): again, for all ages, a picture frame for photos of/with family and friends.

Night 5 (hope): for kids, a night-night projector; for adults, scented candles.

Night 6 (gratitude): write someone “a letter of why you are grateful for them and leave them an empty card for them to write a letter and pass on the favour to someone else.”

Night 7 (surround yourself with warmth): for kids and adults, a sweater.

Night 8 (resilience): superhero socks for the kids and, for the adults, a goal planner or household tool kit (Maccabees means “Hammer,” after all).

***

Rabbi Rona Shapiro writes on ritualwell.org, in the article called “Chanukah gifts,” about using theme nights in an effort to practise moderation. Her family has had Big Gift Night (when each child gets one big gift from their parents); Grandparent Night (gifts from the grandparents); Book Night; Music Night (a night of songs); Cooking Night (make latkes and enjoy them with friends); Tzedakah Night (wrap presents to deliver to a children’s hospital or other charity); and Homemade Gift Night (such as a family photo album or scrapbook).

Shapiro suggests incorporating some new rituals into your celebration. For example, “Chag Habanot, the seventh night of Chanukah, is traditionally a women’s holiday (it falls out on Rosh Chodesh) when it was customary for women to give gifts and tell the stories of valiant Jewish women.”

For adults, she suggests presents ranging from personal blessings to wine, food and candles.

The draft: a dad reflects

February 2015

Collected the mail this morning. A few flyers and bills. And my son’s draft notice. A quick double take. A flashback to my son playing with plastic dinosaurs. Then I texted my wife, “It’s here.”

A few hours later, my son came home. “How was school? There’s a letter for you on the table.” Opening it, and with a surprising degree of nonchalance, he said, “My call-up.” As if going into the army was an ordinary occurrence. “Ah, yeah. It’s here.”

A few days later, I asked D if I could post a picture of his call-up on Facebook. “Dad, you can’t post this stuff. It’s, like, confidential.” Duh. Of course.

May 2015

Picked my son up from Jerusalem. He was there for a series of pre-army tests. He couldn’t stop talking about the cute chayelet (army girls). Teenagers!

October 2015-January 2016

D interviewed for various roles in different divisions. None of interest. He wants something air force-specific. My wife and I helped him with a letter to the IAF manpower division. Emphasized

his aircraft knowledge. His love of plane simulators. (How many times did we catch him “flying” instead of doing his homework?) His flying lesson (a 17th birthday gift).

February-March 2016

Silence.

April 2016

The air force came knocking. Another interview. Another psychometric test. D felt he aced this one (pun intended).

May 2016

Text message from the Israeli Air Force. Accepted. Not the specific role he wanted but within his window of satisfaction. Excitement. Trepidation. The air force is the darling of the military. Best conditions. High-tech environment. Much to my son’s amusement, I don’t really understand what he’ll be doing.

July 2016

D called me at the office. Draft date pulled in. “Dad, we need to change our holiday plans – three weeks and I’m in.” New York will have to wait. Improvising, we quickly made other travel arrangements. A week later, we were in northern Italy. My son a reluctant traveler. He’d rather be home with his friends sharing the excitement of the draft.

August 2016

Took D for a buzz cut. His beautiful golden locks. Gone. I also had a buzz cut. My less beautiful grey locks. Gone. Solidarity.

We threw a draft bash. Lots of friends and family. I toasted: “We are celebrating your draft … into the world’s best air force…. I can’t tell you how proud we are…. You obtained a role – and I still don’t get it – that is meaningful and challenging, with great responsibility and opportunity. Embrace it. Be safe and strong. Keep us safe and strong. D, sweet child of mine. May God make you like Ephraim and Menashe … and establish peace for you.”

Draft day, 2016

We traveled in two cars. My wife. Our daughter. My mother-in-law. D’s friends. His girlfriend. And, of course, the cadet. We arrived at the induction centre at 0800 hours. Despite living in Israel for more than 22 years, I’m still amazed by the informality. Sometimes disguised as chaos. My Canadian self still says lines. Order. Please. Excuse me. The security appeared to be in disarray. Then I remembered I’m on an army base. Umm … can’t get more secure than that.

Hundreds of young recruits. Balagan. Israeli flags waving overhead. Old ladies passing out amulets with the prayer for the Israeli army. Sephardi grandmothers spraying water into the crowd to wash away the evil eye.

Much too quickly my son’s name was called. Won’t forget the apprehensive “I guess it’s my turn” look on his face. Nor the tears flowing from my wife’s almond-shaped eyes. Nor the tears flowing from my daughter’s green eyes. Nor my mother-in-law’s “shouldn’t there be peace by now?” hunched and saddened look. I took D aside. Covered his head with my hand. Recited the blessing for a son. Then, like at a beach party, his friends hoisted him on their shoulders. Carried him forward. Innocence. Bravado. Another generation coming of age in Israel.

He walked the final distance alone. Oversized backpack. Buzz cut. Excitement. Trepidation. Then disappeared into the military transport and his next three years. Actually, two years and eight months, but who’s counting.

Bruce Brown has been living in Israel for a long time and is the proud father of two Sabras, one currently a sergeant in the Israeli Air Force.

Sweet birthday party for kids

Jordana Saks gets great joy from baking. (photo from Saks of Sweets)

“I love baking, because it’s a fun activity that allows me to be creative. More importantly, there is nothing more fulfilling than the wide-eyed smiles I see on other faces when they enjoy something that I have baked.”

Jordana Saks’ love of baking inspired her to create Saks of Sweets, which plans and leads kids’ birthday parties. “What better way to celebrate a birthday than with friends while baking, decorating and eventually eating the delicious cookies?” she asks on the business’s website.

Born and raised in Niagara Falls, Ont., Saks studied cognitive science at McGill University in Montreal, before heading to San Francisco for a year. She arrived in Vancouver about 18 months ago, and has been in love with the city ever since.

Recalling her early sweet baking impressions, Saks said, “I started baking as young as 6 years old. My mom and aunt inspired me to bake, and taught me the tricks of the trade. When the eggs in my aunt’s fridge were past the expiry date, she used to call me over to practise the art of cracking an egg.

“Every year at Chanukah, for the family party, my aunt and I would make cookies and spend hours decorating them with unique designs. In addition to this tradition, we baked at least one new recipe each month. Still, to this day, when I visit home, we get together for a baking day – trying new recipes and recreating past ones.”

When Saks was studying at McGill, she used baking as a stress reliever, leaving her and her roommate with an abundance of baked goods.

“To prevent ourselves from eating an entire cake or a couple dozen cookies, I started an Instagram account called Saks of Sweets, where I could share when and what I was baking,” said Saks. “My friends would comment on what they wanted to try. I would find out where they were studying on campus and would deliver the goods, until nothing was left of that batch.”

When she moved to Vancouver, Saks recalls listening to a podcast called Side Hustle School, with Chris Guillebeau. “The entrepreneurial wheels in my brain were turning,” she said. “I was thinking about my passions and how I could channel those into a business. And, combined with my love for baking is my love for working with children. I’ve had many experiences working with kids and have enjoyed every one of them. After sitting down for an hour at a coffee shop and thinking about how to combine these two passions, the idea for Saks of Sweets quickly emerged.”

Saks of Sweets provides in-house baking birthday parties. Saks’ clients have loved the parties because, as parents, they do not need to stress or worry about anything except for inviting the children. The rest of the planning is in the hands of Saks of Sweets and Saks leads every party, along with one helper.

“We set up the individual baking stations, and the children will learn to roll out the Saks of Sweets shortbread cookie dough,” said Saks. “They will then choose from a wide variety of cookie cutters to create their cookies.

“While the cookies are in the oven, the children will decorate and personalize their baking aprons. Lastly, they will have a wide range of icing colours and sprinkles to decorate their unique creations. As an extra bonus, the take-home box for the cookies and the personalized aprons double as a loot bag.”

Prospective clients only need to provide a table for the rolling and decorating, and a working oven for the baking. Some parents like to provide a meal for the children, like ordering in pizza.

photo - Saks of Sweets brings the party to your children — Saks of Sweets brings the party to your children. *(photo from Saks of Sweets)*

For those not wanting to have the party in their own home, Saks of Sweets partners with the Jewish Community Centre of Greater Vancouver, so that people can rent the centre’s party room for the birthday celebration.

“Right now, I am doing cookie cutting and decorating, but I’d like to move more into baking other delicious things, such as cakes, cupcakes, pies and more,” said Saks. “This expansion will happen soon, when the time is right.

“When I started this business, my hope was to channel my passions into throwing a creative birthday party that makes both the children and parents happy. I wasn’t overly concerned about the business scalability or strategy, because I didn’t want to get bogged down in the details or dissuade myself from taking that first step.

“From that perspective, my hopes have been met. Each party has been extremely well received by the parents, and the children are always smiling. My only new hope is that I can throw these more often.”

Saks of Sweets is Vancouver’s only in-house baking birthday party. The business concept is all about convenience. It is meant to be stress-free for parents, so they can also enjoy their child’s party.

Saks of Sweets can accommodate most dietary restrictions or allergies and works with clients to tailor the party to any needs or wishes. “For example, in the past, I’ve had to ensure all ingredients are kosher … and I can do parties for families that are kosher,” said Saks. “Furthermore, the ingredients and the cookies are all nut-free. However, they may contain traces of nuts, due to baking utensils that may have touched nuts in the past.”

The cost for a Saks of Sweets party for 10 to 12 children is $300, and each additional child after 12 is $22. For more information, visit saksofsweets.ca.

Rebeca Kuropatwa is a Winnipeg freelance writer.

The pot talk we need

Last week, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced that marijuana would become legal in Canada on Oct. 17. He had intended that it should be legal this Sunday – Canada Day. But the Senate, rousing itself from obsolescence just long enough to throw a wrench in the plans, delayed passage of the pot legalization bill until this month, making implementation by Canada Day impossible.

This may not seem like a particularly relevant topic for a Jewish newspaper editorial, but substance use is just as relevant in our community as it is in any. A few years ago, a panel discussion took place at Schara Tzedeck Synagogue on the topic. Prof. Raphael Mechoulam, a chemist and expert on marijuana’s medicinal uses visiting from the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, and Dr. Kathryn Selby, a University of British Columbia clinical professor in pediatric developmental neurosciences, took opposing sides.

Mechoulam said that cannabidiol (CBD), a component in marijuana, may have medical uses “in almost all diseases affecting humans.” However, little scientific research has been done.

Cannabinoid receptors are abundant in several regions of the brain, including those where movement control, learning and memory, stress, cognitive function and links between cerebral hemispheres occur. CBD can also impact appetite, blood pressure, cerebral blood flow, the immune system and inflammation. It can, in some cases, reduce or eliminate seizures and cancerous tumours.

But Selby raised an issue that has gone almost entirely ignored throughout Canada’s national discussion about marijuana legalization.

Marijuana can have deeply deleterious effects on the brains of adolescents and young adults, altering the brain’s structure and function in lifelong ways. The development of the human brain continues into the 20s, Selby said, and the prefrontal cortex, where judgment and executive functions occur, is the last to develop – thus the most likely to be affected by intensive marijuana use.

Longer-term impacts of marijuana use by adolescents have been shown to correlate with schizophrenia later in life and a 50% to 200% increase in psychoses among heavy users. Daily marijuana use during high school has been correlated with a 600% increase in depression and anxiety in later life.

Selby recommended that marijuana use, if undertaken at all, should be “as late and as little as possible.”

During the national discussion around this issue, much concern was expressed about the ability of law enforcement officials to identify and measure marijuana impairment among drivers. Almost no discussion was devoted to the effects of marijuana on developing brains.

Part of the reason for delaying legalization until October was to allow provincial and municipal governments to prepare for the related distribution, legal and other public policy issues legalization raises. While criminal law is a federal issue – marijuana legalization is on Ottawa’s plate – it is the provinces that determine where, how and to what consumers the “product” may be marketed. In Alberta and Quebec, the age will be 18; in the other provinces, 19. (Most provinces have made the decision to create equal ages of majority for alcohol and marijuana purchase.)

Alcohol has its own harmful impacts on the bodies of young (and older) people, but marijuana may have particular harms on the development of adolescent and young adult brains.

Once the brain is fully developed, by the mid-20s, the dangers of permanent damage by marijuana use are significantly reduced. This scientific evidence – not the fairly random legal decision to permit consumption at age 18 or 19 – should perhaps have received more attention than it has. Given that it did not, it now falls to parents, grandparents, trusted adults and educators to share with young people the potential harm heavy marijuana use has for adolescents and young adults.

It is time Canada moved away from prohibition and towards a compassionate model that reduces and minimizes the harm that stems from fear and a lack of evidence-based policies. Fear-mongering is a waste of time – and marijuana’s positive impacts can’t be denied.

However, for those of us with young people in our lives, a good approach is to model the moderate use of all substances, to leave open lines of nonjudgmental communication (however hard that is) and to demonstrate for one another how to make wise and healthy choices. Sharing information in a rational way and asking young people to avoid heavy use or to delay if possible is the least we can do. It is our hope, too, that pot companies will temper their impulses to capitalize on every opportunity and avoid marketing edibles made to appeal to children and teens so that we’re not fighting an uphill battle. Healthy communities with resilient kids are a group effort.

Negev Dinner helps Israeli children

Left to right: Ilan Pilo, Michelle Pollock, Dr. Neil Pollock, Wendy Eidinger Spatzner and David Goldman. (photo by Robert Albanese)

Vancouver supporters of the Jewish National Fund (JNF) gathered in their finery at the Four Seasons Hotel Vancouver on June 3 to celebrate Israel’s 70th birthday and pay tribute to philanthropists Neil and Michelle Pollock.

Michelle Pollock is a former lawyer, the immediate past president of the board of the Jewish Community Centre of Greater Vancouver, and has co-chaired the Jewish Federation of Greater Vancouver annual campaign’s women’s division for six years, as well as supporting Jewish education, among many other causes. Dr. Neil Pollock is chief surgeon and medical director of Pollock Clinics. He has undertaken teaching missions to Rwanda, Congo and Haiti, as well as being involved in philanthropy at home and abroad.

photo - Bernice Carmeli, dinner co-chair, with Ilan Pilo, David Goldman and Ilene-Jo Bellas — Bernice Carmeli, dinner co-chair, with Ilan Pilo, David Goldman and Ilene-Jo Bellas. *(photo by Robert Albanese)*

JNF Pacific Region president David Goldman welcomed the crowd – who had to pass a few dozen protesters on their way into the hotel – and introduced the evening’s emcee, Michael Nemirow, a friend of the Pollocks, who is also involved in various community organizations and activities. “I’ve done the math, and we have around 11 hours of speeches and entertainment for you this evening, but we’ll try to compress it into three,” Nemirow said, eliciting laughter from the crowd.

After Maurice Moses led the audience in O Canada and Hatikvah, B.C. Lt.-Gov. Janet Austin took the stage. She praised JNF for its work in the “restoration and preservation of the Jewish homeland,” which covers everything from ecological to social to security initiatives. Austin also commented about the Pollocks, highlighting Neil Pollock’s work in Rwanda to prevent the spread of HIV.

Galit Baram, consul general of Israel for Toronto and Western Canada, focused her remarks on the 70th anniversary of Israel, “the only democracy in our region, a bastion of democracy.” She described its strengths in the areas of human rights, medicine, multiculturalism and technological innovation. She said Israel is led by people “both on the right and on the left who love their country with all their hearts” in the face of multiple existential threats. “We rely on our friends who share common values, and Canada, our ally, is among them,” she said.

photo - Honourary chairs Jodi and Alex Cristall — Honourary chairs Jodi and Alex Cristall. *(photo by Robert Albanese)*

“The success of Israel did not happen in a vacuum,” said Baram, citing JNF as a key organization in supporting the state, one in whose name every Israeli has a tree planted. She also spoke of JNF’s contributions in a multitude of activities, including supporting soldiers with post-traumatic stress disorder and her “personal favourite,” the building of a protected playground in Sderot in an area that has suffered shelling from Hamas and other militant groups. Baram thanked Canadians for the warm welcome and open arms with which Israeli diplomats are welcomed in the country.

After Hamotzi, chanted by the Kollel’s Rabbi Avraham Feigelstock, Ilene-Jo Bellas, former president of the JNF Pacific Region (2012-2015), was presented with the JNF Bloomfield Award by local shaliach Ilan Pilo. He described Bellas as an indefatigable servant for Israel who “bled blue and white,” a portrayal she affirmed as fact after taking the podium.

The video on the work of the JNF was introduced by JNF Canada president Wendy Eidinger Spatzner, who explained that the First Zionist Congress established a fund to purchase land in Israel and that this fund became JNF. She talked about JNF’s extensive work to “build the infrastructure of Israel,” noting that it affects the daily lives of “pretty much every Israeli citizen.”

Rabbi Dan Moskovitz then led everyone in Birkat Hamazon, before Vancouver TheatreSports performed a series of improv skits centred on the Pollocks’ life as a married couple.

The keynote speaker of the dinner was Doron Almog, a former major general in the Israel Defence Forces, who received the Israel Prize for lifetime of achievement. He discussed his role as founder of ALEH, the charity for children with developmental disabilities that the Pollocks chose to support with monies raised from the evening.

Almog spoke on the theme of commitment, as experienced throughout his life and in the work he has done for children. He shared the story of the death of his brother, a tank operator who died after being injured, left behind by his fellow IDF soldiers. Almog subsequently swore to never leave behind an injured soldier.

Almog’s son Eran, who was named after his fallen uncle, was born with a combination of autism and developmental problems, and a psychiatrist told the family that he would probably never speak, remaining at the cognitive age of an infant. “This son became the greatest teacher of my life, he taught me more than anyone about life, about commitment,” said Almog.

After his son died, Almog went to see how children like Eran are treated “in the only Jewish state in the world.” What he saw horrified him: “The first thing you saw is the stink; distorted, terrified faces; shameful things. What the hell are these places, why are they being punished more?”

photo - Keynote speaker Maj. Gen. (Res.) Doron Almog, founder of ALEH, right, with local businessman and philanthropist Gary Segal — Keynote speaker Maj. Gen. (Res.) Doron Almog, founder of ALEH, right, with local businessman and philanthropist Gary Segal. *(photo by Robert Albanese)*

Almog discovered that such children were objects of shame in Israeli society. Golda Meir, prime minister of Israel from 1969 to 1974, had a granddaughter with Down syndrome who, as an adult, gave interviews to the press, said Almog. In these interviews, he continued, “she said, ‘Golda never visited me, Golda never loved me, Golda told my mom, “Never mention the prime minister of Israel having a retarded granddaughter.”’ Yigal Alon [deputy prime minister of Israel, 1968-1979] had a beautiful child who, at age 5, was taken away from the kibbutz she was born in and sent away to Scotland and he never spoke about her. And inside me I heard my son screaming, ‘My dear father, I will never complain to the media, you can send me away to Scotland and never speak of me, but, if you do that, you do not deserve even the title of “father” or even the title of human. I am the ultimate test of commitment,’ he said to me, the echo box of your bleeding brother.”

After Almog left the military, he established the village of ALEH, “a paradise where the children can have a full life. We broke the walls of stigma and shame and stereotypes.”

ALEH Jerusalem, a multi-service home for children with disabilities, now receives help from more than 450 volunteers from all over the world. Some of them, said Almog, are children of Nazis, who say they are coming as atonement for Hitler’s decision to kill people with disabilities. “The social chain is always measured by its weakest link,” said Almog, receiving a standing ovation.

After a video explaining more about ALEH, there was a video tribute to the Pollocks introduced by their children, Josh, Elliot and Shoshana. The Pollocks said a few words, after which Goldman and Pilo wound up the celebration.

Matthew Gindin is a freelance journalist, writer and lecturer. He is Pacific correspondent for the CJN, writes regularly for the Forward, Tricycle and the Wisdom Daily, and has been published in Sojourners, Religion Dispatches and elsewhere. He can be found on Medium and Twitter.

Horror at the border

While American elected officials posted pious family-friendly Father’s Day messages on social media Sunday, about 2,300 children remained incarcerated by the U.S. government’s Immigration and Customs Enforcement branch, stolen from their parents at the southern border with Mexico.

The families are migrants from throughout Central America and the idea of tearing children from their parents is dubbed the “nuclear option” for discouraging illegal migration into the United States. Once the families are divided, children and adults begin separate legal journeys. Some parents are being deported while their children remain behind. One infant was snatched from its mother while breastfeeding.

The boys are being held in a repurposed Walmart. No one outside government knows where the girls are.

President Donald Trump, whose administration implemented the inhumane policy, blames Democratic lawmakers for the situation, in keeping with his pathological dishonesty.

Inevitably, social media is making rampant comparisons with the Holocaust. In an age when the Nazi era is invoked just about every time a disagreement arises, this parallel remains troubling. As distasteful as the analogy is though, it does reflect a laudable desire to scream injustice in the loudest way.

“We are better than this,” critics say, or “This is not America,” both of which defy the evidence. As awareness increases about this horror, if Americans are not rallying on the streets in every city and town, we will know whether this is America or whether they are better than this.

Traveling with young kids

(photo by Masada Siegel)

Taking a red-eye flight was no way to end a glorious Hawaii vacation with my nine-month-old, but it was the only nonstop and I figured everyone would go to sleep. Ah, how wrong I was! My little guy, who just had started walking, was so excited that we were not only awake the entire flight, but we spent it walking up and down the aisle.

Having little ones is a game-changer. After having traveled solo for months at a time, where I could follow any whim and not plan if I didn’t want to, my travel style has been turned completely upside down, but for all the right reasons.

So, while I always pack lots of extra food and supplies for my little guy, who’s now a toddler, I’ve learned to pack light for myself. Everything needs to be multipurpose. For example, my go-to travel uniform consists of a wrap-sweater because I use it as a baby blanket, and many friends use it as a nursing cover-up. Also, because it’s attractive, it can dress up a simple outfit.

Part of the travel experience is keeping your kids entertained. The best compliment I got recently was when a woman two rows behind me exclaimed, “What, you have a toddler with you? I had no idea. Thank you for making this a pleasant flight for all of us.”

Truth is it helps to be extremely prepared with planned activities, as well as making sure your little one is excited about the journey. A happy kid makes for a pleasant flight for all. Prior to our trip, I gave my son his own luggage, a super-cute airplane-themed rolling suitcase that also turns into a backpack. He loves it and constantly drags it around with him. I find it helpful for him to feel as if he is one of us, and part of the adventure.

I always pack a number of toys – they all must be useful both on the long flights and at the destination. I never leave home without our Bubzi, a stuffed owl that plays lullabies and projects stars on the ceiling, as it helps with sleep. Another lightweight item to bring is the Cinemood, an ultra-light three-inch portable projector that can be used just about anywhere with a flat surface, as its preloaded with lullabies, books and kid-friendly content. Be sure to pick up kid-safe headsets that protect little ears; Buddyphones are especially good on planes to help drown out the noise, too.

Traveling with a toddler has its ups and downs. On a recent trip, my son, who has always disliked cribs, was sleeping in a bed. Even though he was right next to me, he still flew off of it in the middle of the night, leading to a bruised up nose and an upset mom. There seem to be a million tiny situations that need to be thought through, some as simple as piling pillows all over the floor around a bed.

I’ve also learned that the details matter, such as keeping my little one out of the sun. While I tan easily, my son is blond and fair, leading me to explore a million different sunscreens, many sticky, which led to complaints. While we do use sunscreen, I’ve heard conflicting reports of how useful they are and how bad some of the chemicals are, so I finally changed my travel stroller to one that has on oversized canopy, as extra protection.

A sturdy stroller is also important because you can place your bags in it and my son can walk alongside me or even push the stroller. I’ve realized, the more active he is in the airport, the more tired he will be on the airplane. I always research the airport we are flying into, to see if there is anything to see, such as an aquarium, museum or viewing deck, so as to keep everyone entertained.

However, being organized takes a lot of effort and, while I try my best to keep everything in its place in my diaper bag, sometimes I don’t. I’ve had to dig around for my wallet, plane tickets and all sorts of odds and ends. Usually, a box of milk or other liquid slips my mind and then security zeroes in on me.

Even with a baby in tow, I have been patted down on every single flight I have taken with my son. Security is in no rush and generally don’t care if you miss your plane. On my last flight, I had to run through the airport holding my son to make it in time.

Traveling with a toddler certainly keeps you on your toes, but isn’t that why we travel in the first place, because we want to have new experiences? So, while the getting to the destination is part of the journey, my best advice is to try to enjoy the ride.

Masada Siegel is an award-winning journalist and photographer. Follow her at @masadasiegel and visit her website, masadasiegel.com.

Digital impact on our lives

(photo from publicdomainpictures.net)

Dr. Simon Trepel, child analyst and psychiatrist at the Manitoba Adolescent Treatment Centre, is seeing an increasing number of children and teenagers using phones – even during sessions.

“I was hearing more and more from parents about some difficulties they were having around technology and screen time,” said Trepel. “I was noticing, even in my own family, how pervasive screens are becoming … as a preferred source of entertainment, as well.

“When this stuff marinates in you for awhile, it makes you curious about deeper questions about what’s going on. It ultimately behooves anybody who is working in mental health to start wondering about all the ingredients that might be contributing to someone’s mental health…. I became more curious about how these devices and screen time might be affecting, not just kids and teens, but, really, all of us.”

According to Trepel, using technology in daily life is no longer a choice. It is a fundamental part of how we all get by. Most of us check our phones several times a day, and conduct business and communication on our phones or tablets almost exclusively.

He said there are about four billion people using the internet right now worldwide, and a third of those people are children and teens. There are about five billion people using mobile phones and a little over three billion people on social media at any given time, he said. And, these are all increases of anywhere from five to 15% in comparison to the previous year.

“These trends are changing how we communicate,” said Trepel. “They are changing how much face-to-face communication we have and the nature of the communication itself. The previous generation would use words and texts. Now, videos, pictures and memos are the preferred way to communicate. It’s changing the very ingredients we use to communicate with one another.”

There are implications to this change, especially in children, whose not yet fully developed brains are particularly susceptible to getting into trouble online. But, Trepel said, there is something that can be done – and it starts with adults getting off their phones and other screens, especially when around young people. We also need to start talking about these issues, as kids who come from homes that discuss such topics tend to be less at risk.

“When there’s a more negotiated amount of technology use and supervision and things like that, that is a good thing,” said Trepel. “But, there are many, many kids who have a combination of not a lot of supervision combined with having an immature brain, and these kids are the ones we are most worried about getting into trouble online.

“We worry that screens are displacing a lot of other activities that might be healthier than being on technology – things like getting adequate sleep or being outside. The amount of hours spent outside is now at about half of what it used to be. It’s gone from about 18 hours a week to about seven hours a week in one single generation.”

Getting a handle on this will not be easy, but it starts with parents making the time to fully understand the tech diet of their kids. Just like we monitor their food intake, we need to monitor their tech intake.

“Sit down with them and let them take you through a typical day,” advised Trepel. “What types of sites are they using and for how long? What types of interactions are they are having on this site? The timing of this is important. Is it the first thing they do in the day, getting on their device? Is it the last thing they do before bed? Do they themselves detect any problems with their screen use? Are they running into any cyber-bullying or being taken advantage of? Do they feel better or worse after using their phones? Do they notice phones cutting into their sleep, or do they notice themselves having a difficult time stopping themselves from checking? This is the beginning of getting data about how your kids and teens are using their phones. But, it’s also starting to ask the question of whether or not this is becoming a problem for your kid or teen.”

Trepel suggested that, when you monitor your kids, you want to make sure it is active monitoring – that you are co-viewing and discussing the sites that they are on. It is also important to avoid spy-type programs, he said, as kids will find ways to work around them.

Aim to be playing together, following each other on social media. Use any opportunity for educational guidance – not so much making it a single conversation, but, instead, an ongoing dialogue about the device. You can ask for their help learning about social media, for example. “I think that’s a very elegant way to cover a lot of bases,” said Trepel. “It allows the parent to learn a lot about what the kid is using, in terms of technology use. But, it also updates the parents as to what these social media sites are all about – how they are navigated, how they are used.

“It may also be a great way for kids and parents to spend more time together, interacting with each other, teaching each other. While they might teach you about Twitter, you might be able to point out various ways they are using the technology that might be helpful or harmful. You might, if the child teaches you Twitter, find out if the child has a public account and is being followed by hundreds of people the child has never met before.

“It’s not only a way to have a child feel good about helping a parent, but, once the parent knows more about the technology, the parent can start to look for red flags.”

Studies have shown that parental behaviour is one of the most powerful influences on a child’s behaviour. So, Trepel suggests taking an honest look at yourself as a parent, about how embedded these devices are in your own life. And then, start to change that for yourself, while also becoming a good role model for your kids.

“You want to be proactive with your kids,” said Trepel. “You don’t want to wait until there’s a problem. You want to educate them to the possibility of problems.

“You also want to be proactive about texting and driving. This really might be the drinking and driving of our generation. I remember, when I was in high school, there was MADD, Mother’s Against Drunk Driving. I think we need some sort of revival of that, looking at parents being concerned about texting and driving. The stats from Manitoba are striking that, just five or 10 years ago, we were seeing maybe 3,000 collisions per year. And, in the span of just a few years, it’s now up to 11,000 collisions involving distracted driving per year – a four- or fivefold increase, about 30 distracted driving collisions a day.”

Trepel said it is best to avoid taking technology away without offering an alternative. Make it easy for kids to see their friends in real life, he said. Let them go over to their friends’ houses, take them places they want to go, and do things they want to do – provide them with in-person opportunities. Play a board game, do arts-and-crafts, encourage them to learn to play an instrument or participate in a sport. Off-screen activities, he said, have a greater likelihood of making your kids feel happy as compared to on-screen activities.

Trepel suggested having your kids turn off their phone notifications at important times of the day, like sleep time, family time, meal time, school time, and so on. And make sure that you do the same.

“Every time we get a signal from our phone, it could be someone liking our photo or giving us a compliment, or something we anticipate might be good,” said Trepel. “And that reward system in our brain kicks into gear and compels us to want to check what the notifications are. Once our screen is on and in our hands, we might end up surfing or doing something else we weren’t even intending to do – at the expense of whatever original activity we were doing before the notification occurred. So, we have to make sure that we turn off all those attention stealers.”

Trepel recommended that parents turn off the wifi after 9 p.m., or even earlier, if they think there will be a significant battle to have their kids turn off their screens in the evening or if it is affecting their ability to do homework.

Or, he added, you can get your kids a phone with no internet capabilities. Some executives, he said, have even switched back to such phones, as they were wasting too much of their time when they had a phone with more tech capabilities.

For starters, Trepel said, begin the conversation. Ask your kids for ways to keep things under control. Dialogue, go back and forth, and find ways that work for your family.

Rebeca Kuropatwa is a Winnipeg freelance writer.